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[Channel 68] News & Weather Together

5/24/2017

 
​*The familiar static crackle of the channel switching over to AP local 68 once again solidifies into the familiar faces of Ariana Bening and Raymond Wages at the news desk. Both today for some reason wearing the exact same sports coat, though Ariana seems to be wearing a low cut blouse underneath while Raymond has his dark blue power tie.*

Raymond: “…at this time the initial appearance of the gentleman has sparked some debate as he has entered a plea of ‘Not guilty’ to all charges of possession of sexually explicit material of a minor. The man is being held without bail, local officers at the township say that is due to several threats made against his life by concerned citizens. The trial is scheduled to begin this July.”

Ariana: *Shakes her head and frowns* “And we will have more on the aspects of this case from our…legal consultant Mary-Ann Ratering later on in the hour. But for some other news concerning minors we go to Jeannie Webb at the Bay Area Public School District.  Jeannie?”

*The camera cuts to Jeannie Webb standing in the lobby of the District Administrative offices of the Bay Area Public Schools. Behind her somewhat camped out or standing in line or milling about are numerous adults. Some chatting, some just standing there checking the time.*

Jeannie: “thank you Ari, As you can see there’s a crowd already gathering for today’s School board session. Today is the first open session since the budget for the district was submitted for approval, which means that today and most of the sessions in the upcoming weeks will revolve around determining what percentage of this budget will be paid by individual townships in the district.”

*Jeannie turns and motions to the crowd, some of whom wave back, some ignore her and others make faces and ham it up a bit for the news, before overlaid on the screen is a map of the school district.*

Jeannie: *Voiceover* “The people here are representatives of various townships in the Bay Area who are looking to provide their input on just which townships should pay which percentage. As you know all the individual townships in the district send public students to the same schools rather than having individual schools for each, what the district now needs to decide is how much of the money requested in the budget submission will come from each district.” *As she speaks the various townships highlighted on the map show several lines and pie chart percentages which have been previous years data. The Camera then returns directly to Jeannie.*

Jeannie: “The main issue that usually comes up is percentages of the cost being funded from wealthier communities against those who have more children of school age. Not to mention transportation costs for both busing and ferry passes. Sometimes the debate meetings can last all day and well into the evening as various community representatives state their cases and counter-arguments as to why they should pay a different amount.  Considering just the High School is slated for a Two point Eight Eight Million budget for the upcoming year, it’s almost guaranteed to be a bit of a tooth and nail fight.  From the bay Area School District, I’m Jeannie Webb”

*The camera cuts back to Ariana and Raymond at the news desk*

Raymond: “Thank you Jeannie. Sounds like it’s going to get pretty heated over there. “

Ariana: “Parents and money usually ends up that way Raymond.” *She turns to face the side camera as it cues up on her* “Speaking of things getting heated, Wilbert Woods has what you can expect from Mother Nature this week. Wil?”

*The camera cuts to Wilbert Woods standing in front of the radar tracking screen. As he stands there a plastic (obviously) dinosaur wiggle-moves it's way onto the screen behind him and then looks like it's trying to beat him with it's open mouth.  Little word bubbles appear above it's head going "RAWR" And "OM NOM!" Till Wil starts moving and the Dino disappears.*

Wilbert: "Thank you Ari. Wel have a remarkably beautiful weekend ahead of us. Today, sunny clear skies with highs in the near eighties. Dropping down to the mid Sixties tonight.  Tomorrow, more of the same..." *As he says this the image behind him shows a "chibi" Anime version of Wilbert in a Speedo standing on a beach flashing the Peace sign.* "...Temperatures reaching low Eighties in the afternoon and dropping back to high sixties overnight.  Sunday night this storm front moves in and clouds thicken up, making Monday start out overcast with little sun, that keeps the temperature fairly steady in the low Seventies till the afternoon storms arrive and it drops to the upper sixties.  Overnight it'll drop into the low sixties as rainstorms continue."

*He indicates the front of rainstorms moving through on the projection map.  The front "grows" a pair of googly eyes and a word balloon stating: 'Don't touch me there!' As Wil motions to various parts of the front*

Wilbert: "Tuesday we have cloudiness with continued showers, this cold front pushing the rain into the area starts to move in and our temperatures drop into the low sixties to upper fifties for the morning and evening. Showers mostly drift on out as the cold weather hits, with a few lingering and scattered over the area going into Tuesday night.  Wednesday we continue with intermittent showers starting out the morning, becoming a steady rain storm later on in the afternoon.  The high only being about Sixty three as that cold wind keeps moving through the area.  Wednesday night and Thursday look about the same with intermittent rain storms lingering here and there and popping up all across the map as temperatures linger in the cold range."

*The weather map behind Wilbert shows a half-dozen cartoon images of generic people wearing bathing suits with icicles hanging off various body parts and teeth chattering*

Wilbert: "Friday is still overcast in the morning with light rain showers here and there, remaining cloudy but the ran letting up in the evening, the temperature sticking in the middle sixties as the cold front moves onward out of the area.  Saturday the clouds keep lingering heavily overhead, but this does push the temperature back up into the low seventies as they slowly decrease going into the evening, So Sunday the Twenty-eighth as this cold push is out of the area we are back to partly cloudy skies and Upper Seventies for the temperature. "

*The camera cuts back to Raymond and Ariana at the news desk*

Ariana: "Ugh, looks like a final push of cold air from our lovely Canadian neighbors."

Raymond: "Looks like we should have had them build that giant Space Heater huh?"

*They both laugh a bit remembering the story from a while ago about the giant Space heater to stop Canada from sending their cold fronts.*

Raymond: "Well tourist season is upon us, and once again local municipalities are looking for a way to cash in on the boom in transient travelers by way of taxes.  That's right once more a seasonal local tax option is being considered by numerous townships around the bay area and state itself.  Currently there is local tax on restaurants and lodging and other generally considered tourist fares, this option would adjust the tax rate for such during those peak activity months if enacted by the local municipality.  Some would begin in March and go till September, others would start in April and go till October, it all depends on the local ordinance and would cover such things as Hotel lodging, car rental, Boat rental, Eating in a restaurant, getting take out or Delivery of food and grocery services."

Ariana: "Currently the adjustment rate is legally not allowed to exceed two percent during the busy season and proponents say that with all the extra traffic and tourists flocking to the area it would be a real boost to offset the costs of upkeep and utility usage.  As you recall we already covered the water and sewer companies seeking a proposal for a seasonal hike in costs during the peak months earlier in the month.  Detractors state that this tax only benefits industries and areas with more specialized hotel and restaurant facilities and doesn't really assist communities with national parks and open beaches nearly as much which also see a high rise in wear and tear of facilities due to increased tourist traffic. Also hotels and restaurant owners state that such an adjustment causes problems for book keeping and changes in the way they handle their accounts to make certain that the proper amount is paid from the month under such a seasonal tax to a month not."

Raymond:  "Another group who is opposed to this are the so called 'Snow birds' or persons who spend the warmer months residing locally, and travel to southern climates during the winter.  Claiming that they are local residents, but that utility hikes and raised local taxes during their time here is unfair.  The proposal goes to the state next month, and if enacted could show up on the local ballots for enactment this summer and take effect as early as March twenty eighteen.  As usual if you have some insight or opinion to share on this there is a link on our website to Bay Area community speaks forums where you can provide your opinion and read what others are saying about important legislation.  Also restaurant and shop reviews, upcoming events and even a garage sale section where you can buy and sell items with other locals. "

Ariana: "On the subject of tourism, there's a new term being spread around.  Glamping. Now I know what you think, it sounds like some new kind of thing local youth are getting into you have to listen and intervene in."

Raymond:  "In fact when the erm came up at the News topic meeting our producers made it very clear that we were not sending Dean under-cover into the Red Light District again..."

*Both he and Ariana can't help but grin and chuckle a bit at that remembered debacle*

Ariana: "But a Internet search and some discussion later the issue was cleared up and Kaylynn Garcia has that story on just what Glamping is and how it's coming to Maine this summer.  Kaylynn?"

*The screen cuts to Kaylynn Garcia sitting on a large 4 poster bed in what looks like a fairly nice furnished cabin*

Kaylynn: "Summer is a time for camping, fires, marshmallows, sleeping bags and tents. Roughing it out in the middle of the woods or beach, or even trekking out to the middle of nowhere with your recreational vehicle, not so much with delivered fresh lobster and seven-hundred thread count Egyptian cotton sheets."

*She stands up and walks across the floor and pushes on the "wall" to open the flap on a...tent!?!? and steps out in front*

Kaylynn: "Glamping, or 'glamorous camping' is coming to Maine this summer.  Sandy pines, Willow Brook and Bear-trails campgrounds will be furnishing between fifteen and a hundred of these glam tents on their facilities this summer for nightly or weekend rentals.  All are professionally decorated, and feature amenities such as room service, electricity, some will even have local cable channels on high def televisions and improved wifi access."

*She walks down along the rows of large spacious tents spread around, several with various designs indicating a difference*

Kaylynn: "All the tents have themes, Arabian nights, Nomads, Nautical journey and so on.  Also included are mini fridges, fans, some even have rear decks with grills and five or seven of them in a pod will share a communal bathouse with hot water and internal plumbing facilities, including a steam room.  The tents themselves have been equated to being in a luxury hotel room, only inside a tent.  As a bonus for June renters at the start of the season fresh Lobster can be delivered either cooked or live for your own cooking as part of the menu.  The owners of the campground say that this program may continue if there's enough interest in having it on the menu."

*She reaches a central area with a large firepit and numerous benches stools and tables all around arranged like a old theater area*

Kaylynn: "The rentals start at around one fifty a night on up to two ten depending on the date and availability, they suggest you check out the camping site website for booking arrangements.  and for those who still want to do things the old fashoned way, there are still hundreds of primitive and RV sites still at the individual campgrounds.  Though for some the expanded wifi is well worth the additional luxury.  This has been Kaylynn Garcia for Glamping."

*The camera cuts back to Raymond and Ariana in the news room*

Raymond: "Hrm, interesting.  From what I understand the Glamping trend started in Europe and has recently made it's way over to the US in the past year or so.  Also we'd like to remind our viewers that although Glamping may sound amazing, these are still primitive campsites and thus don't have safety or other standards set by building inspectors or the like the same way you would at a actual hotel facility.  You are effectively renting someone else's tent and sleeping in it, so keep that in mind before you book."

Ariana: "Good thing you bring that up ray, as another facility is having health and safety problems of it's own going into the busy season.  For that story we go to Dean Knopinski at Seal Cove Rustic Cabins.  Dean?"

*The camera cuts to Dean standing amid what looks like several dozen log cabins that have been demolished, though on closer inspection it's obvious they are still in the construction phase. and haven't finished being assembled*

Dean:  "Thank you Ari, the owners of Seal cove Rustic Cabins who were looking to expand their facilities this spring by erecting nearly fifty new single cabins and thirty doubles have run into a bit of a hiccup as the permits they had for the old buildings didn't cover the new, and the land they purchased to expand on was in violation of local zoning ordinance for such facilities. Enforcement officers arrived today to issue a cease and desist order for the construction crews.  This spells some bad news as it may close the entire facility for most of the summer and the owners are already ~BLEEEP!!~"

*He exclaims as one of the state police officers comes rushing by on a four-wheeler.  causing Dean to step off the dirt path, and trip over something.  Stumbling a couple of feet to fall head-first into a large concrete foundation still being poured.  landing in the liquid concrete and splashing around like some kind of swamp thing rising up from the murky depths flailing about covered head to toe in the gray fake stone as the camera cuts back to the news desk.*

Raymond: “I’m sure he’s okay.” *He adjusts some papers and turns back to the main camera* “After the break, bridges and ramps for the main byways, which are being delayed on repair and construction and how will this affect your commute? Communities all around the bay area have allocated funds and accepted bids for landscaping, what this means for your taxes and neighborhood. A table saw was reported stolen Friday, where police say it ended up and why.”

Ariana: “All those stories and more after these commercials.”

~Cut to Commercials~

[Channel 68] News and Weather Together for May 14

5/14/2017

 
*The familiar buzz of static as local AP Ch 68 cues up for news and weather. The first image is of a car with its front end wrapped around a light post with the rear end smashed up fairly badly as well. Another car with it’s front end torn up sitting off to the side as several flashing lights of Sheriff and emergency crews are on scene. The familiar voice of Raymond Wages speaking over the image.*

Raymond: *Voiceover* “…Seen here where the cars came to rest, the driver of the first vehicle had his wheels turned to make a right at the intersection which is how his car was pushed into the lamp post.”

*The camera cuts back to the news room showing Raymond and Ariana Bening at the news desk.*

Ariana: “The woman driving the car that struck him has not yet been identified by the authorities, however the first driver has stated that he had stopped to let a pedestrian cross when the second car suddenly rear-ended him and sent them both around the corner. Authorities stated that thankfully the pedestrian was missed by the vehicles and was unharmed, There is no stop sign or signal at this intersection, and both drivers are being taken to the hospital for examination. It’s also unknown if drugs or alcohol were involved in this collision.”

Raymond: “And a happy Mother’s day to all those out there who have been called mom.” *The screen behind him shows several pictures in sequence of himself and an older woman who has to be his mother as he gives her a edible arrangement basket, a image of Ariana laying side by side with a similar looking woman with mud mask facials and towels at a spa, Jeannie Webb and another older woman playing what looks like beach Volleyball. * “Just a reminder that though you may appreciate all they did and all they do every day, today is the one to let her know you appreciate it, or at least finally clean all your old things out of her Garage like she’s been asking you to.”

Ariana: *laughs softly and adjusts some papers in front of her* “And it’s not only human mothers who get special notice today.  Some other mothers are getting their pups off to a good start, Kaylynn Garcia has that story. Kaylynn?”

*The camera cuts to the Field reporter standing on a sandy beach with the morning sunlight making the sand and waves sparkle. In the background several dozen baby seal pups can be seen laying on the sand…digging in it with their noses and front flippers. Several are chasing each other in the splashing waves and seeming to play tag, with the water or each other who knows. One rather fat looking one is laying on its back splayed out seeming to take in the sunlight.”

Kaylynn: “Thank you Ari.  As you can see harbor seal pup season has started, which means all the young pups are learning how to swim and catch fish from their mothers. From May to Early July these pups will be a sight on the beaches as their mothers are out foraging for food. The harbor authority has asked us to remind our viewers that it’s best not to approach the pups. You may find them by themselves, or in small groups, and may be tempted to try and help them, but this is not a good idea.”

*The camera shows several close ups of baby harbor seals playing or laying or nudging at the camera with a “nose front’ view*

Kaylynn: *Voiceover* “They look adorable and your heart may be dying to hear them cry and carry on, but like many aquatic mammals, harbor seals are not in distress, they need to spend some time out of the water resting. The pup may approach you, snuggle up and may even try sucking on your shoe, this is normal behavior and doesn’t mean they have been abandoned or need assistance.  Mother harbor seals go out foraging for food and return to the beach they left their baby at to feed it through the day, meanwhile like all babies the pup is developing its muscles and getting a healthy layer of insulating fat.”

*The camera comes back to Kaylynn standing on the Boardwalk with the pups in the background*

Kaylynn: “It’s best to leave the pups alone so as not to scare off the mother. There are rare cases where the pups are actually abandoned by an ill or injured mother, or she dies while out foraging. In this case fish and wildlife wardens are trained to assist and help the pup. If you think a Pup has been abandoned you can call the number below, or on our website, and contact a member who can come out and assess the situation.  Do not approach, touch or try and put the pup back in the ocean, like many babies they need rest and if they are on land, they are most likely resting. Do not pour water on the pup or feed it, at this young age the pup is still developing it’s insulating under layer and may not be able to handle cold seawater or digest anything other than milk. And amazingly enough Seals are lactose intolerant so giving them cow’s milk as a surrogate mother may just make them sick!”
*The camera splits to show the newsroom again with Kaylynn on the other side*

Ariana: “Lots of good information, and Oh they look so adorable!”

Kaylynn: “I know I just want to go play with them, but it is illegal to touch harass or harm any marine mammal in the United states, so I guess I’ll just have to watch from back here.  This has been Kaylynn Garcia beachfront.” *The camera cuts from split screen back to the news desk*

Raymond: “Thank you Kaylynn. Now as we all know a lot of people make elaborate plans and try and surprise their mothers with a surprise brunch or picnic or other gathering. To tell us what the weather has in store for today and the next couple of days, here’s Tammi Bean standing in for Wilbert Woods. Tammi?”

*The camera cuts over to the perky blond wearing what looks like an overly long sweater that goes down to above her knees. As the camera cues up she blinks surprised and then smiles big*

Tammi: “HiiiIIIII! Everybody!” *waving excitedly at her own reflection in the camera lens* “As you can tell it’s one of my favoritist times of the Whole year!” 8She speaks with just a tint of Awe to her voice like it’s some big revelation* “And that time, as you may recall is….” *She fumbles a bit…the microphone making some scruffing noises as she starts yanking the sweater-dress up over her head and holds it up triumphantly revealing the silver and black Bikini underneath* “….BIKINI TIME!”

*On the screen behind her the words “BIKINI TIME” in big swollen balloon lettering bounces around like it’s dancing as she twirls the dress overhead before throwing it off screen.*

Tammi: “That’s right, time to pack up all those nasty itchy thick winter cold weather things and break out the Bikini! Now I know what you are wondering…You are wondering ‘Well Tammi…what kind of Bikini is right for me? Stripes?  Polka-dots?’ Well never fear, Here’s my suggestions!  Polka dots are okay, but if you have a light suit and dark dots you may get some strange looks till they get in close enough to see you actually don’t have like six…” *She motions to her own substantial chest obviously meaning nipples* “I tend to like a good set of contrasting stripes or a solid color just to avoid the problem.  As for thickness….”  *She pauses as someone speaks to her from off camera*

Tammi: “OoooOOOOOh…right I’m supposed to be telling you what days are best for wearing the bikini rather than what one to wear.” *She giggles* “Silly Tammi…” *She licks her lips and puts on her “Serious face” putting her hands together in front of her like how Wilbert tends to do to start off his weather report, which does nothing to keep her chest from pressing together and sticking out. as the daily weather-track images pop up on the screen behind her*

Tammi: Oooh somebody got all the moms a nice week ahead. lots of poofy clouds and sunbeams, and all kinds of little circles! Starting out today it looks like lots of poofy clouds with Sixty seven little circle, but after night time it looks like it drops down to fifty nine little circles with some icky rain.  But that's okay cause who wears their bikini on the beach at night right?" 8She giggles as the weather track moves on*

Tammi: "Tomorrow, more clouds and poofiness, and some scattered showers." *She looks confused for a minute* "Aren't showers taken in the bathroom? Oh wait they have showers at the Gym...and the beach and the spa...okay that makes sense then. But the big thing is we get up to seventy-three little circles despite all the showers, and overnight the temperature holds onto sixty seven little circles and no rain just moonbeams.

Tammi: "The bestist part of the week is after Tuesday tho, when it's all sunbeams and small clouds with the little circles staying between sixty five at night and Seventy nine during the daytime! " *She points and motions to the parts on the map all excitedly making everything jiggle for the camera* "So those are the days to go and use your bikini knowledge at the beach!" *She puts on one of those stern "pout" faces as she holds up a finger* "And don't forget to use good Sunscreen, see you at the beach!"

*Another giggle and she blows a kiss to the camera as it cuts back over to Raymond and Ariana sitting at the news desk, both not entirely certain what just happened.  Ariana regains her composure first and clears her throat*

Ariana: "Ah...yes...Thanks...Tammi, as always that was....enjoyable."  *She obviously kicks Raymond under the table when he Snickers a bit at Ariana's Dry tone and something off camera. Most likely Tammi taking Ari's comment at face value and being perky and cheerful even more*

Raymond: *Grunts as he's kicked* "The sailing club, who call themselves the Wharf Rats, from the local High School competed in the Marblehead open and according to Jeannie Webb, they are bringing back some big news. Jeannie?"

*The Camera cuts to Jeannie standing on the dockside with all manner of sailboats being tied up and packed up or unloaded, behind her sitting on the side of a local School bus are several dozen boys and girls half hanging out the windows hooting and hollering holding up a trophy*

Jeannie: "That's right Ray, as you can see behind me the Wharf Rats took Second place in the overall timed trials, but claimed First boat across the line, and even extra points for having no boats fail the courses. Which meant they tied for first place in invitational!"  *She turns at the announcement to Fist-pump at the kids who break into new hoots and hollers and cheers*  "This means this team beat out the Marblehead High Founders, the Richard Stevens Academy Privateers, the Roger Williams High Skipping Clams and the Hampton Falls Broadsiders.  They tied in points with the Tabor Academy Irregulars and for the next year the title will be held by both schools.  No Bay area sailing team has taken First place since the first invitational forty years ago.  WHARF RATS!" *She cheers and most of the kids behind her stick their noses up and paw at the air like rats clawing at something as the camera cuts back to the news desk*

Raymond:  "Certainly cause for Celebration.  Closer to home, after the recent inclimate weather and people buying new replacement or first time emergency equipment, Dean Knopinski has been following a story currently on the State Legislature about disposal about something really important."

*The camera shows several bouts of archived footage of ships and boathouses and even a couple of cars burning uncontrollably with Dean Speaking in voice-over*

Dean: *Voice-over* "If you are out on a boat, or lost in the woods, or end up with a flat tire and need to make sure people can find you or notice you, flares and other such devices can be a lifesaver.  however many times people don't check the expiration dates, test them to make sure they still work, or dispose of them properly and merely stick them away somewhere, and the results, can be devastating."

*The camera Cuts now to Dean himself standing along side the Coast Guard pier holding his microphone*

Dean: "Even here at the local coast guard office, there's no state mandated location or procedure for disposal of flares." *He holds out the mic to one of the officers who smiles and then shrugs*

CG Officer: "That's right, for ourselves and several other guard offices around the coast we take the ones that are near expiring or are the oldest when we get new supplies and take them out during the daylight hours and set them up to burn and detonate on a barge that we are retiring to help build man-made reefs out in the gulf. Elsewhere, they'd have set procedures from the state or county on disposal, Which is why we can currently get away with that kind of controlled explosion disposal, but it does mean we can't accept old supplies from private or commercial ships who need to get rid of their own supplies."

Dean: "The Criminal Justice and Public Safety committees for the Maine Legislature are currently going over proposals to submit for full referendum that would put proper disposal programs in pla...."  *He's cut off as suddenly what looks like a Takeout coffee Hits him square in the face and Bursts soaking him in the brew as somebody off mic can be heard Screeching.  Coming into view wielding her oversized purse like a battle-axe or morning star beating Dean about the head shoulders and anywhere she can get a target on is a lady who has to be in her mid Sixties or so, silvery-white hair intermixed with the Dark, like any number of older ladies you see anywhere.*

Mrs. Knopinski: "You ~BLEEP BLEEP~  Son of a ~BLEEP BLEEEP BLEEEEEEP~ FLARE DISPOSAL!  Your Sister Sent me A Card and Your Brother Had the Decency to Call but All I get from you is a ~BLEEEP BLEEEEEEP~ Text ~BLEEP~ Message and not even a 'Hi Ma' For the Camera! You UNGRATEFUL!" *She continues going through her tirade while beating upon Dean more and more. *

Dean: "Ma...No...I...Ow!  Could You...OW....OW....Take the Rocks out of the Bag First Ma...OW!"

*The camera cuts away from the scene back to the news desk where Ariana is giggling and Raymond is doing his best to look serious*

Raymond: "A good cautionary story on how we may soon have a way to handle explosives...Explosive tempers will take some more research and legislation it seems."

Ariana:  "Halfway through this week the newly retrofitted docks are expecting their first arrival of a major cruise ship. our Favorite Intern Kyler Victors has some details.  Kyler?"

*The camera cuts to the fidgety intern doing his best to hold still and speak slowly standing down at the longer Reception area with the Closed off pier behind him. The entire place is strung up with blue and green and yellow crepe paper strands in the colors of the cruise line.*

Kyler: "Yes Miss Bening, Err Ariana, This Wednesday between Seven AM and 3 PM the first Cruise liner will drop anchor here at port. We know the name of the ship is the Amadoa of the Dawn Skimmer Cruise line LTD company.  It's a small ship with only Eight hundred passengers and Four hundred Crew, but a good test of the new docking and passenger facilities that have been in the works here and a nice boost to the local attractions. Many of the local restaurants and tourist spots have ordered in extra supplies in anticipation of a rush.  The ship will remain docked for Three days and depart on Saturday to continue it's trip Northward to visit several locations in Canada.  This has been Kyler Victors for Local 68 News."

Ariana: “Exciting news, thank you Kyler. “ *She shifts position to address the second camera as it shifts to that view* “Spring cleaning is in full swing, and there’s good news for those of you with lots of big bulky items that need disposed of.  The Council of Selectmen has adopted a plan to help get rid of those big things just gathering dust or otherwise needing gotten rid of.  The number below or at our website you can call this week and next and have them picked up! For all those wondering, I did already check and deadbeat boyfriends and husbands are not covered by this service, no matter their tonnage.” *She flashes a sly grin at the camera.*

Raymond: *Chuckles softly at her joke* “The Highway Division will be picking up large items curbside by appointment all this week with the exception of Tuesday and Thursday between the hours of seven AM and Six PM, and next week with the exception of Wednesday and Friday. The items do have to be out at the curb for pickup, they will not be coming into a house or garage to help you move it.  There is a list of day labor companies who have volunteered special rates for two to four man teams who will help you get the waste items out of your home and to the curb for pickup. That phone number you can see on the screen below.”

*The camera picks back up with the main desk view as Raymond turns to direct his attention towards the audience.*

Raymond: “After the break, taking the long way? You may not have much of a choice as road crews are expected to close the main highway around the island down to one way. What you can expect in the way of detours when they do. Also, can’t find a parking space? How one woman is being cited for abandoning her vehicle in the middle of an intersection. And speaking of abandoned vehicles - looks like the local Asphyxiation Point Fire Department is still having issues getting one of their firetrucks out from a sink hole that appeared uptown. More on that story and the underground discovery that followed after these messages.”

~*Cut to Commercials*~

[Channel 68] News & Weather Together

5/1/2017

 
*The familiar static of the television tuning into AP Local CH 68 News dissipates on the familiar Newsroom with Raymond Wages and Ariana Bening sitting behind the desk.  The Screen splits to Show Kaylynn Garcia in front of the Police station.*

Ariana: "...sounds like they had a bit of a crazy night."

Kaylynn: "Yes they did.  it seems an intoxicated male whose name is not released at this time, was picking fights with random individuals. What made it even stranger was he was standing here in this parking lot in front of the Police station when he did so. It seems by the time that dispatch realized the gentleman was just outside he had already vomited on the side of the building and was making lewd gestures at the nighttime nursing staff across the way at the hospital. He was not charged with disorderly behavior, and instead drove him back to his residence. or where his residence used to be. Shortly after leaving him at the location believing him to be sober enough to make it inside on his own, dispatch received a frantic call about a attempted break-in.  it seems that the man was pounding on the Door and demanding that Someone named Frannie let him back in, and that he was sorry and that Blond didn't mean anything to him."

*Ariana and Raymond both chuckle and shake their heads*

Raymond: "Quite a pickle it seems."

Kaylynn: "By the time the Cruiser got turned around and back on the scene the man was nowhere to be found, they believe he sobered up enough finally to remember where his actual home is as there were no further incidents."

Ariana: "I'll have to make certain my license has my updated address on it. "

Raymond: "Thank you Kaylynn"  *The Screen goes back to normal view at the news desk* “Dean Knopinski is still out today. Our producers have asked us to pass along that the doctors say he should make a full recovery. And the Bureau of Fish and Wildlife has issued a statement that the family of beavers involved in the incident will be transplanted to their new habitat following the outcome of the rabies tests.”

Ariana: "We certainly wish him a speedy recovery.  Covering for him today is our Intern Kyler Victors reporting from Acadia National park.  Kyler?"

*The View changes to said intern standing in the middle of a wooded area of the national park with a umbrella in one hand and his mic in the other*

Kyler: "Thank you Miss Ariana.  Acadia national park today reported that their carriage roads and tours that usually open this time of year are closed until further notice.  Due to inclimate weather and budgetary cuts at the National and state level, the roadways were deemed unsafe to take the horse-drawn carriages on after the morning sunrise ride got stuck a quarter mile into the trail and they had to bring all the passengers and drivers back by off-road vehicle.  Once the ground dries out some more they will assess the situation.  One of the rangers mentioned they usually have funds to lay out gravel and other materials to keep the paths from becoming a mire, but this year their budget was cut and they couldn't obtain the supplies.  He suggests checking their website to see when these trails may be open again."

Raymond: "Thank you Kyler, And we will have a link to the Acadia national park website available on our own homepage.  And now with a Look at if that weather is going to dry up anytime soon, Wilbert Woods.  If I'm not mistaken, didn't you propose to Two of your last Three Fiances On the Acadia Carriage trails Wilbert?

Wilbert: "That's right, there's a little picnic area halfway along that the carriage stops at for a bit and you can walk around and snack.  Beautiful scenery all around, One was in Spring when the Trees were blossoming, the other I did in October when the leaves were turned and falling. "

Ariana: "Sounds pretty memorable..."

Wilbert: "I thought so, not nearly as memorable as the break up, however, but at least the proposal didn't leave a scar like the last one.  On to the weather, Today we have scattered showers across the bay area with A light bit of Fog that should fade out before noon, it'll only be in low areas that it'll linger past nine.  With temperatures getting back up into the Mid to upper seventies starting at around eleven and on into the afternoon.  Occasional clouds and light winds will keep us nice and warm till after sunset, that's when this cold front will push into the area and the temperatures will drop into the mid fifties overnight.  More fog expected Sunday morning as the temperature stays cool and slowly climbs up into the upper sixties peaking at possibly seventy in the Afternoon."

*The map behind him shows several advanced green and scattered yellow cloud formations moving across the display.  The arrangement really looks a lot like a erect penis moving across the area, and with the usual "difficulties" Wilbert has with the graphics worker, it's hard to tell if that's intentional or just the way mother nature has it.*

Wilbert: "Sunday evening the clouds intensify and will most likely turn into thunderstorms around sunset, those thunderstorms will linger over night and heading into Monday morning, the temperature though, thankfully, lingers in the Mid Sixties going into Monday morning.  Those Thunderstorms will break in the morning and become light rain during the early part of Monday, the cloud cover sticks around keeping things overcast, though the rain becomes intermittent in the afternoon scattered here and there around the bay area.  The Temperature Lingering around Seventy two for a high At around Three Pm on Monday.

Wilbert: "Overnight Monday those rain showers continue to linger, going into Tuesday where around eleven they finally calm down, but the Clouds remain which will push the temperature up into the mid Seventies during the daylight hours as the rain rolls on out and near the End of Tuesday we should see some sunshine and only a few clouds with moderate winds.  Overnight the temperature would drop back into the Upper Sixties.  So it doesn't seem like it's going to dry out on us any time soon, but at least it's not getting back to Frigid temperatures.

Raymond: “Sounds like some more of the same lovely days with some imported rain from Seattle Wil.” *He adjusts his seat to face Camera 1* “And now We go to Jeannie Webb At the local High School where the Beacons are hosting the Spring open.  Jeannie.”

*The camera cuts to the morning hour expanse of a track and field event with several teams of youth stretching, jogging and otherwise preparing for the events.  Wisps of Fog still drift here and there about the field making it look a little eerie.  Standing in the forefront is Jeannie Webb wearing her usual headband and light green tracksuit.*

Jeannie: “Thanks Ray.  As you can see the teams are getting warmed up and ready to compete for the Spring open rally. Thirty high Schools from along the Northeast have traveled here this weekend to compete including my old Alma-matter!  Right now they are waiting for the fog to clear out so they can begin the events.  With the Bay Island Sailing team coming in ninth yesterday in the O’Day Qualifier race the Beacons are looking to build on that momentum and come out on top as well. The meet runs all day and unless there’s thunder or heavy rain there shouldn’t be any delays, and I’ll keep you updated as the competition progresses.  If you are in the area come on down and cheer on the beacons. I, however, kind of hope the Fieldmice do well also.  From Island High-School, This has been Jeannie Webb.”

*The camera cuts back to Focus on Ariana at the News Desk*

Ariana: "The Island housing Symposium will be hosted by Island Housing Trust at Marine Auditorium at the BA Biological laboratory Next Wednesday from Three to Nine PM.  The symposium will bring in experts to share their experiences in addressing their communities’ housing challenges. Which were already an issue before the most recent storm, but should be addressed even more-so now after such widespread damage. Local residents are encouraged to attend.  "

*The camera moves to focus on Raymond as he smiles*

Raymond: "For those unable to attend we will most likely have someone covering and a summary report available afterwards.  Also coming up, Eight Townships and Villages in the bay area have candidates nights available to meet the potential new Selectmen for their councils.  The Election for the Selectmen boards is upcoming for all these locations, and voters are encouraged to come out and meet those running in person.  Many will have Question and answer sessions after a meet and greet and speech by said candidates. Those selected, we remind you the public, will be the first council to vote on the September Financial Budget for their communities and Several of those communities have fairly important tax levies on the agenda."

Ariana: “After the break, meet the man who is turning windmills into artwork and just how much of your electricity bills these pieces can save you. Also seven local students arrested at the hospital for trying to smoke a mixture of pine resin and Banana Peels? What were they thinking?  All that and more after these messages.”

~*Cut to commercials*~

[Channel 68] Local & Weather Together for April 27

4/27/2017

 
*The familiar static crackle as the television settles in on AP Local 68 News. It starts off with a discussion with the familiar face of Raymond Wages on one side and the severe-faced Legal correspondent, Mary-Ann Ratering, on the other side.*

Mary-Ann: "Well it's quite simple dear boy, the salvage crews want to have the wreckage of those houses labeled as Maritime Salvage under Admiralty Law and get paid by the insurance companies for whatever they bring up from the depths.  The Insurance companies, naturally want it postponed till they can do a cost benefit analysis and determine if paying to retrieve the salvage from the wreckage is of benefit to them before agreeing to Pay salvage finds or merely write off any claims they may currently have and force the salvage crews to fend for themselves on selling whatever they get."  *She smiles lightly, just at the corners of her lips and steeples her fingers before her chin*  "The problem is, the salvage crews are still pulling up bits of artwork and so on from the wreckage every day, and the Coast guard and state have yet to even inspect the area for what manner of damage debris or clean up can be done.  They slip in under the nets and take whatever they can and then expect to be paid for it. It's nearly delightful the possibilities of how many may be opening themselves to illegal salvage or theft lawsuits."

Raymond: "So for the time being trying to buy back the antique chest or grandma's ashes from a salvage person would result in potential legal troubles?"

Mary-Ann:  "Of course dear boy, currently all that insured material filed as lost is owned by the insurance companies, it'd be just the same as if you paid someone for a Ferrari that they stole out of someone's driveway.  Receipt of stolen property and all that dear boy."

Raymond: "Well I guess those who are being offered a chance to buy back their belongings should keep that in mind before hitting up chadslist."  *He adjusts his papers and Flashes a smile.*  "As always thank you for your insight and Hopefully they can get this all sorted out soon."  *The Screen swipes back to just Raymond at the News desk as he turns to face Center camera*

Raymond: "Ariana Bening is out today, so lets turn to Wilbert Woods with what we hope is some good weather news whether you are hitting the beach or going diving for Sunken treasure.  Wil?"

*The camera Zooms in on Wilbert as he stands n front of the Radar map indicating several pressure systems moving through the area.  If one looks close they can see one of them is Labeled "Yo  Momma"*

Wilbert: "Thank you Ray. As you can see here on Live Cobra Radar we had Fog move in this morning chilling things a bit, and if you were up early enough you would have heard the Foghorns going off."  *A brief display behind him of a Animated Wilbert Blowing his nose all Loony Tunes Style*  "That fog will disappear early and temperature will rise into the Upper Sixties, though scattered cloudiness all through the Afternoon will keep temperatures from rising too far.  As you can see several storm clouds will slip on in over the nighttime hours taking the Temperature down into the Upper Fifties.  Light winds and scattered Showers last all through the night. Those Showers linger into tomorrow, Intensifying a bit as several scattered thunderstorms will be appearing.  The high pressure system pushes this Warm front into the area and we may see some temperatures in the Upper Seventies by the afternoon hours.  Fog Rolls back in tomorrow night."  *The Screen indicates the source of the Fog is another animated Wilbert bent over releasing farts into the air*

Wilbert:  "As the Fog rolls in, the Thunder will roll on out, and the temperature lingers in the Mid Sixties till Saturday.  Saturday light showers will pop up here and there but nothing severe, once the Fog clears out before noon the temperature rises swiftly back up to the Mid to Upper Seventies around the afternoon hours - heating things up considerably.  Occasional clouds and light winds will keep it there till nighttime, when a cold front will move back into the area and the temperatures will plummet once more into the Mid Fifties over Saturday night.  At the start of Sunday, Sunshine and Clouds start off early as the Fog Rolls out shortly after sunup.  Staying that way and getting back into the high Seventies in the afternoon.  Sunday Evening Clouds thicken and we get some more scattered showers early, these may become thunderstorms later on after midnight going into Monday. The Temperature lingering in the High Sixties.  So all in all a good weekend to go out and enjoy the warm weather, but make sure you bring a umbrella just in case."

Raymond: "Thanks Wil, Sounds like it'll be a nice, warm weekend for pretty much anything."  *He turns back to the main camera*  "Speaking of Anything this weekend, the National prescription Drug take-back day is set up for this Saturday from Ten Am to Five PM at the local Police and Fire departments in the bay Area.  Drop boxes will be placed in the lobbies of those facilities for disposal of unused, expired or other medications that have been sitting in their cabinets.  If you are unable to get to these facilities, both departments will be taking calls for Volunteers and officers of either department to come by and pick them up from your home on Sunday.  Please call early on Saturday after Ten and noon to schedule the time for pickup on Sunday."

Raymond: "For those of you who have a long Commute around the far side of Loop road to get back to the Ferry terminal due to the rock-slide that occurred during the recent weather problems.  Dean Knopinski is in the Field where work Crews are working to Dislodge the Tons of Mud and Rocks from the Main byway to re-open it for traffic.  Dean?"

*The Screen cuts to Dean wearing a Orange vest and yellow helmet standing by some flashing construction barricades. behind him several bulldozers and Diggers are working to Dislodge what looks like a brown avalanche that swallowed the Roadway.  other Crews seem to be Erecting Restraining walls and fences on this side to keep more of the Hillside from Collapsing*

Dean:  "Thank you Raymond. As you can see this main byway to get from The Northwest part of the Island around to the Ferry terminal has been blocked by a great deal of Rubble.  Crews have been working to Clear it out and secure what remains for Days now to re-open this vital byway.  Currently with this route closed those looking to get to the main Southern Terminal have to go halfway around the entire island back to the East and then Through several townships.  They Don't yet have a ETA on completion yet, but Many of the workers remain optimistic ~BLEEP~" *As his eyes go wide and his comment cuts out. *

*With an Audible "SPROIIING!"  The Chain-link Restraining fence they are putting in falls off a stack of several of them and Bounds off the Top of a Bulldozer and Seems to Unfurl like a Spring...The Entire Mass of metal coiled wire landing atop Dean and Knocking him over.  his Microphone dropped so you can't hear whatever he's saying,though from his face it's clear it's not too nice, As he thrashes against the metal and Slips off to the side...The Steep hill rolling down to the Seashore as he goes rolling like a Wrapped barrel bouncing off the hillside and disappearing from view, The Camera Cuts back to The main newsdesk*

Raymond: "Ahem...I'm sure he'll be alright.  Hopefully they'll have that roadway opened up soon, traffic earlier I hear was horrible. "  *Another adjustment of his papers and he turns to The Second camera*

Raymond: "Coming up after the break, It's tourist season and that means Debit card Fraud is back on the ride at local businesses and facilities.  Kaylynn Garcia has a special expose on what to look out for to keep your information safe.  And do you have a Scuba license?  Do you want one?  Sign up for the Harbor Cleanup Auxiliary patrol and they will get your Scuba Certification at a discount provided you put in so many hours of helping Professional Coast guard divers clean up rubble that found it's way into the ocean.  Jeannie Webb has that Exclusive on where you can go to sign up and get certified.  All that and more after these messages."

~Cuts to Commercials~

[Channel 68] News & Weather for April 7, 2017

4/7/2017

 
​*As one tunes into AP Local 68 for the daily dose of news and weather, the static is a bit more intense as the channel stabilizes, probably due to the weather. The picture comes up on some of the offices at the Court House for Asphyxiation Point. The office is buzzing with activity as several persons are moving about, pulling hard copy files out of any number of what looks like a hundred storage boxes set up against a wall. A half dozen laptops set up for them to start processing information in.  Jeannie Webb standing there out of the immediate way speaking with one of the AP government clerks, “Under-Secretary Eduardo Ridlon, Government Correspondent” is the name listed beneath the screen as Jeannie holds out the microphone for him to speak.*

Eduardo: “As you can see the Assessor’s clerks are going through all the property files on their list, checking to see when the property was last assessed, the current tax listing, and a bunch of other public records for the property to list improvements and insurance so they can figure out which properties need to be re-assessed for property taxes.”

Jeannie: “Wow, sounds like a lot of work. And as we understand this is due to a call from the Selectmen council for local taxes to be correct?”

Eduardo: “naturally, some of these properties haven’t been assayed for property taxes for over two decades, and in that time improvements could have been made, or decayed. Don’t forget we have had two years of pretty damaging hurricanes.  Not only is this to make sure all the property taxes are correct, but also for insurance purposes. Insurance companies need to make sure they are charging the correct amount for re-building should the worst happen, having this information up to date will help with that.”

Jeannie: “I can imagine how frustrating it could be to have your house or business burn down only to find out the insurance company is only going to cover eighty percent of the rebuilding cost, I mean you can’t rebuild eighty percent of a business.”

Eduardo: “Naturally, and in some cases the insurance company is only covering half the rebuild cost, As you can see having the accurate information about these properties not only helps make sure everyone is paying their fair share of taxes, but can help insurance rates locally by making certain the insurance companies aren’t taking a loss on rebuilding.”

Jeannie: “Now with the weather being as horrible as it is, are you certain that this is a good time for reassessment? What if we get another Hurricane and all those numbers change?”

Eduardo: “Well Jeannie, if we don’t do it now, it may not happen for months if not years.  I guess the thought is that if these assessments are going to change at least we’ve got the preliminary work finished, which should make the physical inspections that much easier.”

Jeannie: “Thank you Eduardo.” *The screen splits to cut in the view of the news desk at the AP CH 68 with Ariana Bening and Raymond Wages.* “The Assessors would like us to remind persons that so long as they have kept the public records of their home or business including any improvements they have made on file at the office, the chance of being inspected is minimal. Live from The Court House Property Records office, This has been Jeannie Webb.”

Raymond: "Thank you Jeannie. Looks like I'll have to make sure that the new siding I put on, last year after Atticus tore half of it off, is on file. "

Ariana: "And of course don't forget about that therapeutic hot tub you put in around November."  *She flashes a beatific smile as Raymond winces slightly* "And speaking of weather, from Georgia to New York there have been all kinds of drastic weather shifts. Flash flooding in places, Tornado watches, even hail." *This screen shows several people picking up what looks like golf balls only to have the camera zoom in and show giant balls of ice of that size* "Several homes have been lost due to lightning trikes all along the coast as this system moves it's way on up over the past two days. We now go to Wilbert Woods to Tell us what we can expect.  Wil?"

*The camera moves over to the Weather Center with Wilbert Woods standing in front of a coastal map indicating the storm-front that they are discussing and showing it animatedly moving on up along the coastline*

Wilbert: "Thank you Ari, at this time we're still not 100% certain that the weather will get that bad around here, though there will definitely be some high winds and a lot more rain.  The general analysis shows that a lot of the worst of it should stay off shore and not make landfall.  That doesn't mean we are out of the woods yet."  *he chuckles softly at his own pun and shows the Forecast tracker image*

Wilbert: "Today, a sharp drop in temperature as this cold front moves through the area, with heavy and light rains intermingled as the Cold front pushes the warm front system north and takes it's place.  Highs that were in the Mid Sixties will only be reaching Fifty or maybe Fifty Three today, Overnight dropping to The High Thirties with more intermittent Rain.  Tomorrow, More Rain with Cooler temperatures with a high of Fifty, but mostly sticking around the mid Forties going into noon and after sundown, high winds and Chilly rain can cause black ice and freezing rain to fall overnight going into Sunday.  Sunday we peek back up into the High Forties, and that temperature sticks around for a bit till sundown when it drops back to the High Thirties.  if we are going to get any hail that would be the night for it. "

*He presses his remote showing the Extended Forecast to display behind him.*

Wilbert: "Monday we are looking at heavy rain and thunderstorms with patches of sunlight showing up here and there as the front moves along the coastline.  Gusting winds can get up to Forty miles per hour though, so be careful if you are anywhere near the beach or piers as sudden waves may rise five to ten feet in places.  Tuesday we start out with scattered sunshine darkening into heavy cloud cover during the afternoon and evening hours.  the high will be in the upper fifties as this warm front slips back into the area, Still expecting rain though nothing too severe, Going into Wednesday we expect heavily cloudy skies in the morning which will lessen and turn back into sunshine in the late evening, the highs getting up to the mid Sixties. "

*As he talks about the mid Sixties a photo-shopped Wilbert shows on the background with several "Well past cougar" Age women hanging on him like he's the pimp-daddy.  As usual with the background additions, it doesn't seem to be showing on his monitor.*

Wilbert: "Naturally we are still watching this storm front closely in case it intensifies or changes. You can download the bay Area Weather Team App to keep up to date with any alerts or notifications. And meanwhile, our partners at the Asphyxiation Point Times have shared the following tips on how to prepare to keep you safe - just in case. *The newsticker at the bottom of the screen shows rolling text with a list of said tips* 

"That's what we can expect, I'm Wilbert Woods."

*The camera centers back on Ariana and Raymond*

Read More

[Channel 68] Weather for April 5, 2017

4/5/2017

 
Picture
​*Tuning into the local news broadcast, only a little static as the picture stabilizes on what looks like a overcast sky and a bird flying against the clouds.  Suddenly WHAM another bird streaks into view and snags it right in the middle of it's flight leaving behind only a few feathers to drift about.  The camera zooming back out and centering on a group of people underneath wildlife canopies with binoculars and cameras talking in hushed excitement to each other, finally centering on on Dean Knopinski holding his microphone.*

Dean: "One of the heralds of spring in this area is the return of the Peregrine falco to the national parks, nearby cliff faces are where the falcons make their nests and head to this section of the national park to hunt small birds for food.  The Game wardens say that like the Atlantic Puffin who also returns around this time they take shelter in the craggy cliffs along the shore and despite occupying the same space both of the birds tend to ignore one another when it comes to competition."

*Another sighting as some take pictures and a couple of kids instead seem to be distracted by the large mammal that comes wading out into the pond only twenty or so yards away from the underbrush*

Kids: "Oooh Look Moose! Moosey moosey Moosey!"

*On hearing them Dean gulps and turns slowly...Spotting the rather large moose the antlers budding still and stubby but still rather prevalent indicating to those who know that he's a old bull, and seems to be giving the eye to Dean as he stands there.*

Dean:  "Cut...We...Yes we should get out of here now..."  *Dean skitters back away from the pond...the camera backing away with him as the kids keep catcalling the large moose.  Not watching where he's going Dean trips over a Marker sign for one of the trees there and falls with a "WAOMPH" into the underbrush.*

Dean: "OW...Crap..No...No...Don't you...AUGH!"  As the camera moves in then suddenly retreats with a bit of the Cameraman gagging.  The Familiar form of a Black and White mammal goes darting away from the underbrush Dean is still laying in*

Kid #2: "KITTY!"  *The kid then makes a ICK noise and several others i the area start gagging from the scent*

Kid #1: "EWWWW Stinky Kitty!"  *meanwhile the aforementioned moose, the target of it's disquiet gone from sight can be seen on the edge of the camera lazily munching on some fresh leaves sprouting from the bushes*

*The Camera cuts back to the news room with Ariana Bening and Raymond Wages looking aghast at what had to be their monitor...Raymond collects himself first and shakes his head*

Raymond: "Looks like we'll need some extra tomato soup for the break room today.  That was Dean Knopinski reporting from Acolade Park as part of the Spring Is blossoming coverage."

Ariana: "And since it's spring again, it's once more time to sign up for the Sailing classes at the waterfront.  Available in two, five and ten week courses to learn water safety, and how to handle sailboating on the ocean.  If you are a first timer, old hand who needs a refresher or just want to spend time out on the ocean without a motor head on down to the local Coast guard office and Sign up.  Want to teach a class? Volunteer applications are available at the same location.  Access our website to learn more and how to find your local guard office for details."

Raymond: "And now with a look at the weather, here's Wilbert Woods with what we expect to see today, and what the days ahead will bring.  Wil?"

Wilbert: "Thanks Ray, Well for those of you hopeful the rain would be on it's way out, I hate to say it's sticking around and only going to get more intense.  Live Cobra radar shows a Cold pressure system working it's way up the coast trailing some intense storms as it runs in with this Warm pressure system we've gotten from the North over the past week or so. "

*He turns to show the weather map with the two intersecting lines and the large green and Yellow blob of storms trailing along behind the system as it indicates rainstorms and clouds all along the coastline*

Wilbert:  "Today the rain will remain intermittent and light, but might cause some chills with the higher winds that will be blowing in from the coast.  Highs in the mid Fifties getting up to Sixty one at noon today.  These clouds deepen over night and thicken as the rain intensifies.  The good news is the cloud cover helps keep in the warmth, the bad news is everything is looking to get drenched later on as this cloud system moves on in.  Thursday the rain lingers though the wind will be light with heavy gusts here and there, so be aware in the coastal areas it can get pretty strong...Highs in the mid Sixties maybe as high as seventy in the afternoon.  Chilling back down at night as the winds pick up going into Friday when the main brunt of this weather front starts to slip into the area.  High winds and heavy rains expected all through the bay area with a mild chance of Flooding in some low area.  This rain will continue on into Saturday and Sunday with Thunderstorms and high winds as the main part of this storm front teases along the coastline.

*The map moves to indicate the way the heavy weather slides on in along the coast and along the bay area*

Wilbert: "Come Monday most of the Front will have moved on with lingering thunder here and there scattered about a few pop up showers with just a kiss of sunshine here and there as it heads on out to sea. Highs back in the mid Fifties to Low Sixties as the cold front pushes in for a last kiss of March weather."

Raymond:  "Any chance this storm could develop into a hurricane or get more intense?  I'm certain many remember what happened last year."

Wilbert: "At this point we don't think so, but if the winds begin to swirl it could develop into a heavy storm or minor Hurricane.  We are watching it closely to make sure that if that does happen we can get the alert out on the Bay area Weather App.  Though at this point if it hasn't already formed the chances of it forming into a full hurricane are slim.  Though I make no promises for other storms building out in the Atlantic right now."

Ariana:  "Thank you Wil. Phew...lets hope we can avoid a last minute Hurricane this time around.  I know last time I barely got my windows locked before it hit and most of my neighbors lost their patio furniture and one had their car washed away. "

Raymond: "Indeed.  Speaking of Hurricanes though.  After the Break we will have Jeannie Webb Reporting on the last games of the Duck Island Hurricanes as they look to take home the Trophy in the inter-mural Junior Hockey Championships.  Also, What is the big deal with people being upset concerning the addition to the docks for Cruise ships to make port and why even the Tourist industry has some who are against the additional passengers stopping over."

Ariana:  "But First...Snowbirds, those who live in the bay Area part time say they are being asked to pay full property taxes for the summer months they live here before heading south to warmer climates in the Winter, but are now claiming that when they come back they aren't receiving full benefits or being treated the same as Full time Residents. Even i such things as Garbage pickup, utilities and The new high speed Internet Wifi newly voted into place by many of the outer and main island Communities.  Kaylynn Garcia has that story, when we return."

*Cut to Commercials*

[Channel 68] News & Weather Together for April 3, 2017

4/3/2017

 
 *The standard static of the channel tuning into AP Local 68 News graces the screen as it shows a rather dapper Wilbert Woods With several elegantly dressed ladies (At least one some may recognize as a Red Light District “companion” if they frequent such locales) wearing a Golden tuxedo and laughing as he seems to be demonstrating some kind of trick involving a knife and fork, champagne glass, several quarters and a handkerchief.  

​In the background Dean Knopinski can be seen chatting with a lady sipping a drink near the Eiffel tower prop.  There’s a loud “POP” of a cork being sprung to refill the glasses and the camera zooms in on Dean who suddenly ends up reeling, the cork flying off from where it pinged him right between the eyes.  The man stumbles back, trying to gain his balance on the Eiffel tower, which lurches a bit and sends him falling.  Face first into a server carrying a snack tray (in this case several cupcakes and cookies with icing) which causes a “CLANG” to sound at the same time the entire mess goes “SPLURT” All over his face like a white mess from his eyebrows on down.  There’s a CREEEK and the entire Eiffel tower display finally tips over to land right on top of him. *

*The camera cuts back to Raymond Wages and a rather sunburnt Ariana Bening (her shoulders and chest are a nice shade of red even with the concealer make up they tried to apply, seems someone got a little toasted on her trip south) sitting at the news desk.*

Raymond: “Outch! Well it looks like our boys at least had some fun at the celebration.”

Ariana: “Indeed, Though there was some more excitement, our cameras caught a couple who decided to return to the festivities wearing a little less than they had left in. “
*The camera cuts to the same scene, with a blurred face and “naughty parts” image of a man and a woman bounding back into the dance area hand in hand. Something unintelligible said followed by the man starting and saying something the audible part of which is "...three boobs?"  followed by him grabbing at the woman's chest. Some more unintelligible dialog followed by the man pointing at the camera.  "except that ten foot pink bunny. hey you get naked!"  The girl grabs the man's hand mutter mutter "...clothes on...I DO HAVE THREE TITS!" "told you..."  mutter mutter "...hand and mouth" As he struck a kind of dramatic pose hands on hips.  "And Miller! you almost have a full sized cock too! wow!" mutter mutter as she points and seems to laugh "...tits and like four inches!" The female then ducks a bit as something hits the man in the shoulder. "Look baby free balloons!" mutter mutter "...blow it up"  shortly afterwards the female seems preoccupied "hey! give me your shirt!" She says before seeming to realize the guy doesn't have one and goes taking off.  The guy looks down at his crotch before saying something incomprehensible and chasing after her. Then the Video ends*

Raymond: “We apologize for the poor quality of audio on that recording, obviously the couple in question weren't wired with microphones. After that it’s no wonder that Wilbert called in sick today. So with Weather here’s Tammi bean.  Tammi, what can you tell us about the weather we have coming up?”

*The camera cuts to the Blond standing in front of the weather screen wearing a backless top with bikini underneath and one of those short skirts that hugs her hips.*

Tammi: “Hiiiiii Ray!  I’m sorry I missed the naked people at the Prom, I had to take off early, my date and I had some other things we had to do.  Which reminds me, it is still far too cold to be skinny dipping.”  *She nods as if she just shared a big secret and giggles.*

Tammi: “Well today, it’s Monday right? Yeah it has to be cause I’m here.  Anyway, Lots of sunshine in the morning, with some of those clouds coming in later on as the day progresses to make things dark and stormy looking.”  *She frowns pressing the button on the control making the screen behind her show a Storm cloud with a “frownie” face on it.  Which is apparently what she wanted to pull up as she smiles again seeing it*

Tammi: “Lots of wind and rain coming in later on in the evening. Looks like we are going to get down to Fifty little circles after sundown.  Tomorrow, more clouds and rain, the thermometer…” *having a little trouble with the big word* “getting up to Sixty three of the little circles but dropping back down to forty seven little circles in the evening.  Lots more rain and some scary thunder sticking around the area.”

*The background image changes to Frankenstein’s castle with the lightning flashing behind it*

Tammi: “Those nasty storms keep sticking around the rest of the week with the little circles keeping between Fifty six and up to seventy two on one day, but not very long.  Making the little line bounce up and down all day as the clouds and storms keep sticking around and not taking off like they should.”

*The background graphics showing the linear temperature graph for the week with the temperatures nice, but every day has raining clouds on it indicating it’ll be warmer but wet all through Friday.*

Tammi: “So lets hope that those clouds start taking lessons from my ex and get out of here real fast and that the sun can come back nice and bright....OH!  Sorry Ari...I forgot...the Sunburn thing..."  *She giggles and shrugs as she forgets to verbally send things back over to the Pair at the desk and starts checking her nails and smoothing down her top a bit*

Ariana: "Yes...Right...um...thank you Tammi."  *She focuses back on the main camera*  "It was a year ago today that the Entire Bay area was ravaged by Hurricane Atticus.  This week is a time of remembrance for people and pets lost in the event, and to celebrate those who are still with you.  Even as we again enter into the season where more hurricanes may come.  As a reminder, the harbor master and coast guard ask residents not to lay memorial wreaths or bouquets on the ocean or beach in remembrance of loved ones, a special area near the beach-side chapel has been designated for such to remember all those who were taken a year ago."

Raymond: "Nearby Townsend's council of Selectmen in a closed door session seemed to have voted down a proposal to increase the local law enforcement budget for the sole purpose of purchasing military weapons through the federal program and receive training in such.  The proposed increase was made due to the recent spur of armed robberies and hostage situations in the township, and a similar matter is due to be voted on this month in the point.  An additional proposal allowing the police to use civil asset forfeiture gains to pay for the same has been tabled while the council does more research into the current standing of those seized funds and assets.  If passed the local police in that community and this could receive training starting at the end of May in fully automatic weapons, grenades and other military hardware to combat the surge in armed criminal activity of late."

*He turns to look at a separate camera and the website appears at the bottom as well as the $ tag  $Militarypo or $NooccupyAP. As well as the Friendbook link to search*

Raymond:  "Let us know what you think at the website below, or on chatter and Friendbook about the possible military hardware for the AP police force."  *He adjusts his papers and smiles looking back to the camera*  "And as part of our continuing spring hunting and fishing series, we now go to Dean Knopinski covering the upcoming Elver season.  Dean?"

*The camera cuts to Dean wearing a pair of knee-high mud clomper boots and a raincoat walking along side a river.  set here and there along the river are several posts with what looks like gauzy cloth rigged up like a bunch of up-ended primitive tents sunken into the water. The poor guy looks a mess, still has a band-aid on his forehead and looks like he's been a year hungover, but When you are Dean, you have already used up all your sick time this year to call in it seems*

Dean:  "Thanks Ray.  Elver may sound like something from the Hobbits Quest Movies or the online game, Swords and Spellcrafts, but in this case they are immature eels who have reached the stage where they travel up the rivers and canals from the spawning beds in the sea to hunt and migrate into the inland fresh water pools.  Many of the hunters who seek these delicacies have come out early to set down their tags and traps ahead of season opening tomorrow. the Fish and wildlife wardens are checking to make sure none are operating at this time before the season opens."

*He takes a couple of steps on down to indicate several of the Tiny Swimming masses moving beneath the surface making the water ripple like it's moving, kind of hard to make out till the camera zooms in and shows what has to be thousands of the little things swimming and writhing to swim against the current*

Dean: "A lot like the Salmon who swim back up ~BLEEEEP~" The Exclamation is cut off as his boot gets stuck and he Slides in the mud landing right smack dab in the water...Sputtering and moving back to his feet*

Dean: "PANTS...THEY'RE IN MY PANTS!!!"  *As he starts Slipping and Trying to Move on the Slippery rocks with water and shimmering baby eels flying out of his jacket and boots and trying to get his pants undone to get the writhing things out of his slacks.  One of the nearby game wardens must recognize Dean cause he laughs as the camera watches and you hear someone shout out: "IF YOU CATCH ANY OF THEM WE'RE GONNA ARREST YOU FOR POACHING!" And there's more laughter as the camera cuts back to the news studio*

Raymond: "I'm sure they won't actually arrest him.  Once captured Elver are raised in captivity and used as a delicacy in the making of Sushi."

Ariana: "Well I think I'll skip that for lunch today at least.  Coming up, more controversy surrounding the proposed docks for cruise ships, Local owner of exotic pets finds his cages have been raided and the animals gone, a local animal rights group claims respectability.  All that and More when we return after these messages."

*Cut to commercials*

[Channel 68] Weather and News for March 1

3/1/2017

 
*The familiar crackle of the channel changing as the local AP 68 News office comes into view. Raymond Wages with his light blue suit and dark blue power tie, and Ariana Bening with her indigo low cut top sitting in their seats and speaking. On the split screen is a group of young children posing for a picture holding what looks like a flag, though the design is crayon and glued on yarn perhaps, the backdrop showing them on top of a man-made stone wall, where they are specifically is anyone’s guess. Posing with the kids is a fairly well known historical horror author who has a new book coming out in April.*

Raymond: “What a lucky bunch of kids those little ones are.”

Ariana: “That’s right, and cute as well.  Let’s hope the rest of their trip stays that exciting.” *She adjusts her papers and turns to face a different camera* “Well Spring is in the air, February is on its way out, let’s go now to Wilbert Woods to give us the good news on what we can expect from the weather.  Wil?”

*The camera cuts to Wilbert Woods in front of his weather display map with the local area being menaced by a thick patch of green with scattered yellow “Severe” patches.  He adjusts his tie and tries to smile friendly like.*

Wilbert: “Well Ariana, I’d like to say that the worst of the weather is behind us, especially after Dean’s little adventure with fresh buds au natural.” *There’s scattered chuckling at the most recent difficulty the field reporter encountered.* “But it seems that Mother nature is far from finished with toying with us on pulling out the short sleeves and swim trunks.”

*He hits the button and a image from vacation with a sunburnt Wilbert wearing said Swim trunks with flower pattern carrying an inflatable ducky under his arm posing on the beach appears on the screen behind him.  He doesn’t seem to see it as his monitor shows something different*

Wilbert: “As you can see we have a rather intense bit of weather moving into and through the area all of today on the live Cobra Radar.  Some of these patches are going to be Severe.  The Good news is this pressure system and cloud cover pushes the temperature up.  We should be at a Steady Mid Fifties, hitting a high of Fifty four degrees, and only dropping down to Forty-Five tonight. But we will have high winds, gusts up to forty miles per hour, and steady rain and scattered thunderstorms all through the day.  Tomorrow….” *He presses the button and the Screen switches to a fairly obviously photoshopped image of Wilbert in a Speedo with lots of Muscles like some kind of European bodybuilder on another beach somewhere.* “The cloudy skies linger, but the temperatures start falling as this cold front moves in. Temperatures dropping to a high of only Forty six, and overnight as the clouds clear out it’ll drop back down into the teens and all that lingering water will most likely freeze.”

*This time when he hits his button it switches to the Forecast planner showing the full next week with the temperatures dropping down to single digits and not rising above 39 on Monday*

Wilbert: “As you can see Friday we linger in the low Thirties and overnight drop down to Eight degrees, those winds not doing any help and putting the wind chill below zero.  Saturday, Still partly cloudy and windy, only a high near seventeen, dropping back down to single digits overnight. Sunday we get lots of sunshine, but it doesn’t really warm things up much, making the high about thirty two, leading into Mondayas scattered bouts of Freezing rain make their way in the late afternoon and overnight.  That freezing rain continues into Tuesday giving way to overcast clouds Tuesday night keeping the temperature lingering around twenty-five degrees.”

*He hits another button and the background swaps to a bunch of snowflakes falling down on a pastoral scene, Ariana and Raymond Groan in the background*

Ariana: “You can’t be serious!”

Wilbert: “Yes, Wednesday we are expecting snow showers starting early in the morning and lasting all day, but no more than a single inch of accumulation.  And Thursday gives us a little break but Thursday night next week we’ll get another band of Snow showers moving into the area.  Thankfully with the winds being that low it won’t be quite so bad, but its still snow.”

Raymond: “Well now, sounds like we need to hunt down a certain groundhog and send him back to groundhog day school.”  *He chuckles at his own joke softly and turns back to the main camera*

Raymond: “Breaking news this hour,” *On the screen behind him the word “KIDNAPPED!” appears in big red and black frightening letters* “a local notable has been kidnapped and absconded with leaving no clues as to their whereabouts!”

Ariana: “That’s right Raymond, Catfish Biff the carved mascot that has stood on the porch to greet all comers to Fisherman Bill’s Seafood and Brew house was kidnapped right off the porch and absconded with to parts unknown sometime this Tuesday evening.  Locals are calling it a tragedy and insult against the community.”

*The screen cuts to interviews with several local persons*

Local #1: “It’s horrible! Catfish biff was there when my Grandmother was proposed to, when my mother was proposed to and when I proposed to my wife.  He’s a staple and part of this community!  Whomever took him should be ashamed of themselves….~Bleeep~ing Ashamed!”

Local #2: “There’s been many a night Ol Biff helped hold my drunk self up while I waited for my ride to show up. He don’t talk much but always was a good listener.  I can’t believe anyone would steal him.  They should be tossed off a ferry with cement overshoes for this!”

Local #3: “I can’t imagine any local would take him. If he were real we’d all want him as part of our family. It’s just shameful and makes me feel sick to imagine what may be happening to him right now.”

Ariana: “There are currently no suspects, but the owner of Fisherman Bill’s spoke to us and said that recently the Season finale of ‘Lobsters or death!’ which chronicles several fishing boats in the bay area that engage in lobster hunting aired on the Encounter Chanel.  The Captains from those ships all met up to see who won their bet about the biggest catch and the restaurant got some good publicity from it. But that might also have tempted fans of the show to steal Biff from the porch as a bit of memorabilia.”

Raymond: “Catfish Biff, the lovable round fisherman with the catfish whiskers was hand carved by the original Fisherman Bill, the Great grandfather of the current owner, back after the eatery first opened. The owner is offering a Three Thousand dollar reward for those who have information that leads to the recovery of his family history, and our producers have matched that amount, making it a Six thousand dollar reward to bring Catfish biff back home!  If you have any information please contact the station or Fisherman Bill’s offices at the number on your screen.”

Ariana: "And Such a Shame with The Annual Maine Restaurant week getting kicked off today, to have such a local staple missing a beloved mascot.  Speaking of Maine Restaurant Week, we take you now live to Dean Knopinski and Kaylynn Garcia who are out at Federal Judkins' 'Brew with a view' and 'Local Lucky one-seventy sevens' respectively who are looking to kick off things this year with a bash!"

*The Screen splits and shows Dean and Kaylynn on either side.  Both appear to be in rustic kind of Country style brewhouses with wooden chairs and tables and indirect lighting. Several dozen people wearing black polo shirts with the logo are shifting large kegs some metal some hardwood it seems behind Dean, while behind Kaylynn numerous jacketed waitresses mill about the tables handing out craft beers, cocktails in what look like Mason jars mostly and all number of drinks while a band preps on a stage behind her.*

Kaylynn: "That's right Ari, behind me you can see the Brunch crowd is already gathered for orders and drinks set to kick off this yearly event.  As you may not know Local Lucky One-Seventy Seven started in Spain and the families who founded it are from all over the Mediterranean. They boast cuisine from Greece, Italy, Spain, the South of France and even such exotic Locations as Egypt and Morocco.  All their ingredients are sourced from local farmers foragers and fishermen, and every morning the kitchen staff shows up before dawn to start kneading and making the bread to bake for the day filling the entire area with a lovely smell.  Once I get done with this Rose Sidecar with a infusion of Hot-peppar Whisky I'll be ready to start in on the Brunch Specialty Fried Garlic and Mushroom Mussels! Hows things over with you Dean?"

*Dean obviously listening to the particulars is licking his lips slightly and then chuckles and smiles*

Dean: "Well Kaylynn, I can't say I'm drinking and Peppar infused Whiskey, but this Goat Island brown Ale is quite a kickoff to what promises to be a great Brunch over here.  The Chefs at Federal Judkins' have been cooking their Beef and black Bean Chili all night letting it Simmer and Steep, and Afterwards a Special Federal Judkins mussels half cooked in the Juds Suds Homebrew lager and the other half in the Red Judds Hard Cider before they break out the Judd's Stuffed Haddock.  Right now, as you can see behind me the staff is bringing up the kegs from the brewery in the basement to roll them behind the bar.  I'm told this is a standard tradition for the brewery they do at the start of every month to bring good luck and not 'Skanky beer' as the brewmaster put it. "

*Behind him the staff starts rolling the kegs along the floor with a rumbling noise...the onlookers clapping and saluting.  Dean turns to watch making certain to keep well out of the way as the camera follows the procession.  Each keg one by one moving across from the lift trapdoor to the bar.  the second to last one the person pushing it gets a little show offy and jumps on top of the keg to head it along with her feet, similar to a lumberjack on a spinning log.  Cheers erupt till she forgot to take into account a low hanging sign which summarily clotheslines her in the forehead sending her reeling to the floor.  the Last keg behind her about to hit her when the staff member pushing it makes a drastic turn to spare her from being run over by a huge wooden keg. *

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[Channel 68] Spring is Back!

2/25/2017

 
The familiar static crackle as the channel changes to AP local Ch. 68. Asphyxiation Point’s local source for what’s happening in the area and sometimes the nation at large. The camera comes up upon Dean Knopinski, who's looking none the worse for wear - considering that it's been at least a few weeks since anything overly 'dangerous' has happened to him. He's actually smiling - though we'll see for how long that lasts. As the camera pans out from his grinning face, you see a large swatch of dead, brown, muddy grass in the background - and is that.. shoots of green?

Dean clears his throat, and speaks into his mic, even while turning to point at the land behind him. "Well ladies and gents, it's something that the weather gurus have been promising for a long time coming, but here it is at last. The first signs of spring can be seen behind me, and I have to say.. it looks beautiful." He begins to walk and the camera follows him. "We're just outside of Darling Bay, where the grounds have been covered in snow for the last several months. But as you can see, large patches of brown and yes - even the jade tones of new life - are now visible." He drops down to one knee, reaching a hand towards what looks to be a pile of wet dirt. Or so he believes it to be from the intern who put it there moments before they went live.

Turning back to the camera, a handful of the brown sludge gripped between his fingers, he begins to squish it around. "Just imagine - in a few more short days, the scent of loam and life will begin to permeate the air, just like what we get from this small mud pile right here!" He brings it up to his nose and takes a deep sniff, and that's when someone behind the camera starts to giggle. Then, the camera man gets in on it, and the camera itself starts to shake just a little Finally, thanks to the look on Dean's face as he realizes that the pile he was left to 'play with' was nothing more than a bit pile of dog doo-doo... the entire scene rather collapses, as the whole crew breaks into loud guffaws. Just as the scene cuts off and we're patched back to Ariana at the main news desk, the sound of cursing and gagging can be heard, along with Dean's cries of "That's not .. *gag* funny... *gag* guys.. This.. gawd! *gag* It's all over *gag* me!"

Ariana tries to control her laughter as the cameras turn to her, though her bottom lip is quivering and there appear to be tears in her eyes. "That's right folks," she manages to get out, before snorting loudly through her nose. "You've heard it here first. Spring is in the air! Though, we caution our listeners to not try Dean's approach to getting so 'close' to nature!" And with that said, she finally breaks out laughing, while the camera pans over to the weather desk.

The forecast is left to its own devices up on screen, and clearly shows that the weather will be in the mid to high 50's throughout the week, with low winds coming from the South, and the sun shining down nearly every day. It may still be February, but in the Bay Area, Spring is Back!

[Channel 68] January 21, 2017

1/21/2017

 
*The familiar static crackle as the channel changes to AP local Ch. 68. Asphyxiation Point’s local source for what’s happening in the area and sometimes the nation at large. The camera comes up on Kaylynn Garcia wearing her outdoors on site jacket with microphone standing at the familiar backdrop of the marina.*

Kaylynn: “Local officials and the department of utilities hopes to not only set up the public building utilities to run off solar panels over the next three years, but also set up electric car charging stations that run off the same source starting here at the marina, and eventually spreading to all locations in the bay area.  Some have stated their eventual goal is to get rid of all non-industrial vehicle use for gasoline and move to a completely electric car infrastructure. Though he assured us that this would not hamper industrial, commercial or safety vehicles which need the extra power. So don’t be surprised if you start seeing little gray towers with signs resembling electrical outlets with wheels popping up all over the Bay Area.  Reporting from Northeast harbor marina, this has been me, Kaylynn!”

*The camera cuts back to the studio with Ariana Bening sitting at the news desk, wearing a black top and skirt, as usual low cut in the front and seeming to just hug on her generous curves. Sitting next to her at the news desk is Jeannie Webb wearing a similarly colored top with thin straps showing off her shoulders and neck but not advertising her smaller chest. Pinned to one side of her top is a small silver pin resembling a cheerleader with the local school colors.*

Ariana: “Thank you Kaylynn, Looks like they are going to start pushing us all towards driving Volts or Teslas in the near future.”

Jeannie: *Laughing* “At least they aren’t making us drive a Fiat or one of those tiny Smrt Cars that run off three golf cart batteries Ari. Try and fit my legs in one of those and I’ll be resting my chin on my knees!”

*The woman laughs a bit more and Ari smiles wryly, glancing down at her chest knowing it probably wouldn’t be her chin resting on her own knees*

Ariana: “Indeed.  Now in local happenings, the various communities around the bay area continue to vote on petitions for a moratorium on commercial and medicinal marijuana sales.  Portland is the latest city in the state that has voted to enact a six month moratorium, which will delay the opening of any new stores, cultivation facilities, testing facilities or social clubs that dispense marijuana for recreational and medicinal use. As well as cause the closing of current facilities with their goods held in custody for the period while the local city establishes and votes on various regulations for medical and recreational sales. The first of which are to be submitted no later than six months from now. The moratorium may be extended in six month intervals until the council is satisfied they have a working set of regulations which will be evaluated six months after, when, and if the regulations are finished being submitted to the council’s satisfaction.”

Jeannie: “Portland City councilors took less than five minutes to vote on the measure. There was no public comment and no discussion among councilors.  Other communities such as Brunswick, Boothbay, Liberty, Palmyra, Great Pond, Lincolnville, Camden, Rockland, Blue Hill, South Harbor, Swans Island and Cutler have all voted on similar measures and have passed the moratorium so far.  Numerous other communities have it on their council petition, or agenda to have votes on similar implementations coming up soon.  Asphyxiation Point itself has it scheduled for the council to vote to enact at their First full caucus meeting on February 6th.  At this time no discussion or depositions from the local community has been requested for this vote.”

Ariana: “Some people are claiming that this is an opportunistic move to de-legalize the recreational sales without actually making it illegal again.  Others have gone on record of saying that it seems certain advocacy groups are attempting to take advantage of the current political climate to push through an agenda of their own while nobody is looking. Those in support of the moratorium claim that they think the idea of selling marijuana was rushed into and not fully thought out and it’s a wise thing to pause and look at how it’s going and change those little things that need fixed. At this point it’s anyone’s guess what the final outcome will be.”

Jeannie: “Wilbert Woods has a look at this weekend weather and what we can expect from mama Nature in the coming week. Wil, what do you have for us?”

*The camera cuts to Wilbert Woods standing in front of the radar map showing light cloud cover over the region with the sweeping bar of the radar array slowly making it’s way clockwise around the area.*

Wilbert: “Thanks Jeannie, and I have to say, I see your pin there and hope you let all the girls down at the Big East competition know we’re rooting for them today.”

*He smiles and turns to face the camera directly.*

Wilbert: “The Big East Cheer Camp and Championship competition this weekend is indoors they could have it outdoors, at least temperature wise.  Today we have light winds and mostly cloudy skies, but a high of Forty two degrees.  Those clouds clear out as night comes in and we reach a low of only thirty.  Sunday, Light clouds intermittent in the morning, thickening up in the afternoon the high reaching about forty again, no rain is expected just those heavy clouds covering the sky with winds light in the middle teens.  The low overnight should drop down to only twenty-five degrees.”

*The screen behind him shows the daily chart forecast showing Saturday, Sunday, as well as Monday through Thursday with the temperatures and conditions indicated.*

Wilbert: “Monday is when Winter seems to have returned with a vengeance. The high only being Thirty degrees, Overcast, heavy clouds. High winds picking up during the day with intermittent rain during the daylight hours.  Going into the evening expect higher wind gusting up to forty miles per hour and freezing rain starting out light but getting more intense after the sun sets.  The temperature won’t drop below Twenty Nine, but with the high winds that will feel like it’s in the low teens.   That rain and high wind lingers on into Tuesday, though the temperature raises back up into the high thirties and should reach as high as forty.  Wind advisory is still in effect as the rain continues to fall well into the sunset hours.”

Wilbert: “Thankfully those showers should start drying out early Wednesday after sunrise and the entire cloud cover will disperse by the afternoon, temperatures in the high thirties, only a intermittent cloud here and there to hide the sun.  Thursday we are back to intermittent clouds and sun with the winds back to being light and variable and a temperature in the high thirties.  “

Ariana: “Sounds like a nice reprieve after that horrible winter blast early in the week Wil.”

*She turns and faces central camera*

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