Please. A Bear disappears every few minutes (or hours or something) in the world. Only YOU can help give my story a "Happy Ending".
Anyway . . . thanks for noticing,
Mr. Teddy
(I'm the one on the bottom). My name is Mr. Teddy, though if you call for me I may not answer. I am a tan, fuzzy Teddy Bear about three feet tall sitting down. I've been lost since January 29th and my owner, Mary Underwood ((WickedEGrin)), is quite beside herself looking for me. If you can help me get home, I am sure she would be grateful. Like, very grateful. And I do mean Very.
Please. A Bear disappears every few minutes (or hours or something) in the world. Only YOU can help give my story a "Happy Ending". Anyway . . . thanks for noticing, Mr. Teddy Help wanted: Seeking personal assistant. Must be good at short hand, long hours, have basic computer skills, and willing to travel. Duties will include transcribing notes, setting up therapy sessions for patients, and answering phones, as well as processing patients payments. Please drop your resume or apply in person by visiting Dr Isabella Coletti , 2nd floor of APH.
Ms. More-Comfortable-In-Cargo-Shorts, seeks an escort to social entanglements... err engagements. Respondent should be male, mid-20's to late 30's, and capable of dressing both appropriately and, more importantly, inappropriately.
You? Be shameless. Bonus points for goofy in a charming, rather than wincing, way. Be Roguish. Be geeky. Be entertaining to a woman of simple tastes and a base sense of humor. Be comfortable lurking in corners away from the action but prepared to regale members of the upper echelon of Asphyxiation Point, distracting them from your companion. No expectations other than to give the Lady in question a Plus One to various events requiring her presence. In fact, she can guarantee you won't get laid. Are you Bored enough to offer your assistance? Interested respondents should send an email with the subject line "Knight in shining __(fill in the blank)__" to [email protected]. Creative Content encouraged. ((Not a real address - Send a Notecard with response emails to WickedEGrin)). Do you find it hard to get a date? Wish a woman would pay attention to you? Wrist too sore from repeated wanking? You don't have to go it alone! Call xxx-xxxx (IM or notecard Amaya Grau) to make an appointment with your certified loneliness counselor. Promise to never leave you blue or stiff!
Newton Construction is offer outstanding remodeling, new construction, renovation work, and all phases of home and business repairs. Free estimate
For more info contact Shenson Georgia (shenson diesel) 555-5956 Have you always had a passion for defending the law and taking the bad guys to jail? Now you have a chance! Apply today at the Asphyxiation Court House to become a Prosecutor.
Requirements: Must have a license to practice law in the state of Maine Excellent oral and written communication skills Background in legal or legal studies ((Please contact Vivian Lowe [vivianin] for more information)) Local family in need of responsible and self-motivating Duty Nurse to tend to a member of the household. Applicant must be able to lift 125 pounds and be knowledgeable in handling and restraint. Must be able to track medications and do daily checks on family member three times per day to assure regularity of health needs with discretion. Top pay for the best candidate. If you are interested and would like an interview contact the Head of the Household at (555)665-4554
((IM Jay Biafra (Julian Quinzet with in-character text or call)) Maeve sits down to the interview in faded black hipster flared jeans cut to cover her high heels, and a man's suit jacket that hangs open. The sleeves have been tailored, cut up above the elbow with a cuff of red satin and a matching pocket handkerchief. She wears two belts, one made of light machine gun ammunition. The other has chains, handcuffs and what looks like a set of brass knuckles with a dull gray knife blade on each hip. The blades are obviously rubber, bending when they push against something. She has a septum piercing, the left nostril sports another, and more than half a dozen rings circle each ear. Between her breasts, an intra dermal inverted cross sits over her breastbone. Her abs show a good bit of definition to prove she takes care of herself, but not to the point of obsession. Her hair has been trimmed to a two-inch wide Mohawk in a field of black stubble. In the stubble on the left side of her head can be seen a series of faint scar lines. The open jacket shows off the tribal style tattoo on her chest, which runs down each arm to the wrist. She wears black lipstick and a pale foundation, but not much more than that.
As she takes her seat, Maeve takes off her sunglasses and puts them on the table, revealing her golden-silver eyes. She smiles and withdraws a pack of Djarum Black and a worn zippo. "Mind if I smoke?" She asks in her lightest Irish accent (think Nichole Kidman). Jordan shakes her head as the woman she refers to as a high fashion model lights up, "I don't mind at all Mae. Let's begin shall we?" This blonde reporter hits record and sits back in her chair. This is the introduction of the new face of Climax, the hot nightclub/ lounge on the corner of Atlantic Ave and 2nd Street. The building looks like a warehouse, full of graffiti art and bricks but when you open the steel door what is inside, is the talk of the town. Maeve and I had a nice little chat sitting at the bar stools during an early afternoon before opening where she talked about how she ended up here and her future plans. Like many I have run into, it wasn't a story of happiness and sunshine. "Well, There was this woman, Kenzie Barrett. Swedish girl I'd met in Germany during a music festival. We got really friendly and hooked up a time or two after that. I got a note from a mutual friend that she'd died here. I came over to attend her funeral and maybe stick around to make sure her killer got caught." The woman was calm and cool during the whole interview, after each question she seemed to always ponder a moment with a slow drag of her cigarette before answering. That event did leave her in a new place and wanting to stay. "An island to a girl from Eire? Of course it's charming. But really it's the people I've met here that keep me around. People in the police, the bar..." she winks. "The newspaper ... even one or two I've met in the red light district." In full disclosure when she mentions people at the newspaper, she means me. On a random night in the club you might find this reporter climbing up on the bar to steal a quick kiss from Mae in between the hectic time mixing drinks for all her patrons. She has a lot of experience in this place as she mentions. "I was spending most of my time there anyway, so the manager at the time offered me a job. I agreed and became a bartender. This was back when it was still the Port Hole." Climax is a different place then the Port Hole was, as Maeve described it as "more upscale" and plans to have "Karaoke nights, Live DJ's and maybe even getting some girls from the Red Room to dance here as well." One of the other goals that she has for Climax is expanding the staff. Lots of people come to this beautiful island for a new life and anyone looking for work should contact Maeve. " I'm absolutely hiring. Bartenders, bouncers, anyone else who wants to dance the pole, even if they don't work the Red Room. If the place gets busy enough I'll even want wait staff to circulate through the room like a proper bar, even though it's more of a disco." This woman knows what she wants and she has a plan for Climax. As a woman in this city it is nice to see another one prosper and be put in a position of power to show what she has to offer. Look for more updates on events and other special events coming to the corner of Atlantic Ave and 2nd Street. By the looks of the crowd that frequents the club, a night out there might truly lead to one hell of a "Climax." Its been a while since I've had the delight of visiting this wonderful little island off the coast of Maine and even better yet, was the chance to interview Mr Raven Greymalkin who is now the Proprietor of the Fast Eddies Diner on the corner of Beacon Rd and 2nd Street
Entering the diner I find it a quaint and old fashioned looking diner where you would expect soda jerks and girls zooming pass on roller skates but no, its filled with a lively and entertaining staff. Although center stage was taken by Mr Raven Greymalkin himself. He is a tall man of a commanding presence with long raven hair as befitting his name that flows down the strong line of his back. I'm sure many ladies would sacrifice their weaves for hair that luxuriant . A strong jaw with a slight, devil-may-care stubble that was so fashionable in NYC this last season. Piercing blue eyes stare out from a tanned complexion with just a hint of tattoo'd skin beneath a black utilitarian jacket, classic black tee and blue jeans. I can see this look happening maybe down south but its still quite eye catching for a simple tourist town. We conducted our interview in at the counter of the diner so I could soak up the atmosphere and see Raven at work. LL: "Now Mr Greymalkin. What made you decide to come to Asphyxiation Point and take up the reigns of a run down diner that has seen better days?". RG: "Well, Lillian..first off, call me Raven.... I had been in the Point for a time around 9 months ago...I fell in love with the place, the people and the atmosphere. So when I had finished things I had to take care of elsewhere, i came back. I became enamored of a woman who was here, and decided to stay permanently. I figured an investment in a business was my best bet to do that, and having been raised by foster parents who had run a diner themselves and still do, Fast Eddie's was the best choice. Now the relationship itself fell apart as they often do but I'd made a commitment to the Point and its people and I chose to stay" LL: "Oh no, a tragic love story and it all went to pieces. Please Raven, for the ladies who would be reading. are you single, in a relationship, seeing someone significant..male or female? And such loyalty from you is commendable and as many business owners come and go because of the ebb and flow of the tourist trade. I, for one am most delighted in seeing such a handsome man take up the reigns of this diner and make it something of an island icon, almost as if to rival the phallic symbol up on the hill, the lighthouse." RG: "Well Lillian, for the ladies let's just say that I am very happy with My love life as intense and varied as it may be. As for names....well, that would be telling. I do thank you for the complement, But a good business needs a good staff to accomplish anything and I have lucked into some of the best and, amazingly some of the prettiest. I will say this, the Point has some of the most attractive men and women anywhere and I have managed to hire the cream of the crop. That has helped enormously. In a matter of weeks I have gone from one or two customers a night to every booth and stool in the place being occupied on a semi-regular basis.... and that is as much due to the staff as myself." LL: "Ahh so the prettiest staff. Do you hand select them yourself and give them personal interviews so you can *ahem* rate their performance and fitness levels in performing such duties? Im sure you're all on your feet for long periods of time and all that back and forth and back and forth must surely drain you at the end of the day. Even speaking of it makes me feel exhausted." RG: "Well now, I get your insinuations and I can see how that would be an easy assumption to make....and I will not say that no interactions of that sort take place with My staff. What I will say is this....No person is hired on that basis nor is their job at risk if they choose to avoid such interaction. I rate My employees on the basis of their skill and work ethic and increase their wages when they deserve it. Working in a kitchen environment can be intense and some employees can grow very close but like I said..their job doesn't depend on it." LL: "I see you didn't say no but you're open to such interactions with your staff. Very interesting and Im sure the readers would be delighted in reading this too Raven. Are you hiring now, for those job seekers out there and also I dont see many male staff or you don't swing that way?" RG: "Lillian, do I have interactions like that with my staff? Yes, occasionally, am I hiring?Always, I need decent staff who are personable and social as well as qualified in their job skills. I do hire male employees as well...I am an equal opportunity employer. However, I do NOT swing that way, I enjoy the female form in all its shapes and sizes too much to bother with that of the male." LL: "Well now, and Im sure you'd be very thorough but Im sure your female staff would handle the gents needs to the best of their abilities and not over charge them for their - meals- and as a Boss, do you make sure you take a percentage of their wages for yourself or are you generous and let them keep their tips?" RG: "Whoa whoa whoa...this isn't the red room...or Pandora's or anywhere in the red light district. People don't come here for sex or to be serviced they come here for the food and the atmosphere. And for your information, most of my customers have been female." As you can see from his very words, ladies and gents of Asphyxiation Point, you're well cared for at Fast Eddies Diner. Im sure there's some Chefs Special Sauce happening behind the counter but unfortunately this Reporter never had the chance to sample the thick slab of meat that Raven had tucked away. So next time you want to fill your stomach with some juicy meat, head on down to Fast Eddies and say hello to Raven. Maybe, if you ask nicely, he'll personally serve you. I think this Reporter will be going back to sample his Thick and Juicy in the near future. Lillian Llewellyn Report at large Asphyxiation Point Times Looking for a new career? Wanting a place to work where your creativity is appreciated? Tendrils Salon is the place for you! Tendril's Salon Now Hiring Stylists Two Chairs for rent with flexible hours and availability. You make your own schedule and build your own client base. If you are interested please contact Wendy Sivith (Crucifix Constantine) or Tinkerbell Hunter (Tawny Gellner) at 555- 2887. |
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April 2018
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