I’ve been in a clubbing sort of mood. Being a city girl, my Friday nights were always reserved with me getting drunk and funky at the hottest club available in town. Coming to Asphyxiation Point, I was worried that my clubbing days were over. Boy was I wrong.  

Sounds of thumping and the movements of bodies were the first things one would notice at yesterday’s Lace and Leather party over at the new refurnished Climax club. Walking in, the smell of booze and heavy perfume were in the air as I paced through the packed dance floor. The bar,
being my first stop, was headed by the lovely Angel. Whenever you see this girl, do yourself a favor and get a gin and tonic. Not only is she a European beauty, but her acrobatic skills and mixing drinks will have you staring at
her all night long. Being one of my favorite people around, this sexy blonde Swede will have you returning to the bar frequently even if it isn’t for a drink.

So, having an awesome drink and music to dance to, what else is missing? The guys. And at the party, I found myself staring at some of the hunks of Asphyxiation Point’s finest. Bound in tight leather and wearing nothing to hide their pecs, two went on to winning a competition hosted by the club
with yours truly taking second. But one cannot brag, as the competition was stiff, and some of the hottest women were also strutting their stuff in the competition as well.  

The Climax has somewhat of a special place in my heart. I tend to come over to enjoy a drink with the lovely Angel and also enjoy some of the music that plays throughout the day. Everything here is just perfect for having a great night even if your day hasn’t gone your way. Something about the Climax and its atmosphere gets me at a euphoric high that sex wouldn’t give me. In a way, the Climax is a climax of a different and more fulfilling desire.

Written by Allie Summers

​There are over 65,000 bars in America and when one goes to a bar, it’s mostly to have a drink served up to you. Out of all of those bars, what makes the select few a local favorite? Personally, having the right atmosphere and space to enjoy a (strong) gin and tonic is how I usually go about picking my favorite watering holes. Having recently moved to Asphyxiation Point, I came across Anderson’s Dockside Bar, a typical small town bar located in Lower Town across from the beach. Anderson’s is a bar without the fluff or the worries of… well… anything! The first thing a newcomer would notice, walking into this establishment, is the bartender, Mary, the bar’s resident ‘badass’. The woman’s ‘no nonsense’ attitude is refreshing to say the least. While serving up your drinks with an extra kick, she always manages to toss a few smart remarks and quips that will sure to make you smile sometime during the night. And amidst all the clinking of glasses and the usual sounds of a busy night at a bar, you might be lucky to chance upon the tavern’s owner, Dean Anderson. Using his namesake as the establishment’s name, you can understand the man’s character just by walking in and spending an evening at the bar. Looking like some hunk in a survival expert TV show, this grizzled man will charm you with his roguish smile and charisma.

And as important as the people are to any establishments, the location also adds to the experience as well. The first things I notice whenever I come to Anderson’s is the smell of the wood that makes up most of the interior. The warm, vibrant colors the interior adds for a more intimate mood. Whether a patron be alone or with company, the welcoming and honest atmosphere is what draws people in.

And that’s just what this place is. A place where you can experience good, honest people paired with the intimate and inviting setting that the bar offers. Even amongst strangers, you can feel a warm and sweet vibe of the overall atmosphere. The same sort of feeling you get while having a sip of a well-mixed gin and tonic that leaves an honest, warm bite, but reminds you of a sweet aftertaste as well. 

By Allie (alysabethsummers)

Local family in need of responsible and self-motivating Duty Nurse to tend to a member of the household. Applicant must be able to lift 125 pounds and be knowledgeable in handling and restraint. Must be able to track medications and do daily checks on family member three times per day to assure regularity of health needs with discretion. Top pay for the best candidate. If you are interested and would like an interview contact the Head of the Household at (555)665-4554

((IM Jay Biafra (Julian Quinzet with in-character text or call))

Since our last article on this developing story, we have been given exclusive statements regarding the incident between former Asphyxiation Point Police Chief DeSanta and Poe Biafra. These eyewitness accounts clarify the events of April 22nd, coming from Dr. Grey Jameson, owner of Fast Eddie's Diner; Captain Kayleigh Green of the Asphyxiation Point Police Department; and Mr. DeSanta himself.

According to Dr. Jameson, the confrontation erupted in the early evening of the 22nd between DeSanta and Mrs. Biafra while the former was having coffee at the diner with one of AP's police force, Captain Kayleigh Green. Still experiencing a great deal of physical pain from the ordeal, DeSanta recalled in a recent interview: "She saw me sittin' in a public place wi' a woman...a formah colleague, an' assumed ah were cheatin' on mah girlfriend. She were takin' photos an' sendin' 'em on her cell. Ah asked that she stop...in a touch more colahful language than that an' things escalated fr'm there. Ah should point out the whole time ah were sittin' in the chair in the booth an' made no aggressive actions towards her."

"I think she has a vendetta against him," Captain Green speculated on why Mrs. Biafra may have attacked. "She came at him with a nasty attitude from the start, she obviously has a problem with him, but I don't know her well enough to know why."

Dr. Jameson's account corroborates this. "Things became intense very quickly," stated the diner's owner. "It started with what I believe to be a misunderstanding on Mrs. Biafra's part regarding the nature of Mr. DeSanta's and Captain Green's sharing a booth. Accusations flew back and forth, and then Mrs. Biafra pulled a gun on Mr. DeSanta. He'd said something about her husband, from what I remember. She just unloaded her gun on him after that."

As previously reported, Mrs. Biafra shot six times at DeSanta. Captain Green, seated across the booth from DeSanta had a front row view of the incident. "I watched DeSanta falling to the ground, I heard him say something so I knew he wasn't killed outright. I seen Poe move away, and I didn't want her to escape or reload her gun or get another weapon, so I had to attempt to restrain her, but she attacked me. She was eventually taken into custody when back up arrived and DeSanta was taken to the hospital."

These actions have led to Mrs. Biafra being charged with attempted second degree murder, although this incident seems simultaneously surprising and not surprising to those involved. "I know Poe is crazy [sic], but I thought she would put the gun away as she had a cop telling her to but then again she has a history of shooting people; she shot her husband before," said Captain Green. Despite previous incidents involving Mrs. Biafra, it's clear that neither DeSanta nor Captain Green actually felt threatened at any time. "If ah had, ah wouldn't ah got shot. Ah di'n't think she'd act'lly do it," DeSanta admitted. "What were prudy dumb ah me in all honesty, aint 'xactly the first time she's done somethin' lahk that. Ah mean she were banned fr'm guns f'r reason, yahnno?"

DeSanta and Mrs. Biafra have had a long history together, much of which has been overwhelmingly positive. "Ah've known Poe long time now. Tah point where she's practically family, least that was what ah considered her as. Ah'm godfathah tah onah her kids, Ah delivered her twins, Ah covered f'r her an given more secon' chances than what is numerically possible," DeSanta recounted. Their history, however, only strengthens his resolve to continue with pressing charges against her. "Ah don' got a low opinion ah Poe, not in the slightest. Ah'm not gonna drop the charges, cause ah believe that takin' this tah trial will ensure that the authorities have tah ensure she is treated appropriately in ordah tah keep ev'ryone safe."

The mental state of the accused may play an important part in the upcoming trial. Dr. Jameson, who has PhD in Clinical Psychology, also operates a private practice in Asphyxiation Point and is exceptionally qualified to provide an opinion on Mrs. Biafra. When asked about the mental state of the shooter, she had this to say: "Mrs. Biafra is a complicated woman with a unique perception of reality. In her mind, what caused her to attack Mr. DeSanta was very intense and very real, regardless of how anyone else might have viewed it. I don't think she has any particularly malicious intent to hurt people, but once she has her mind set on something, she gets a laser-like focus on it. It's my professional opinion that she simply needs help distinguishing fact from fiction and controlling her impetuous choices through extensive therapy and possibly with the aid of medication. Perhaps, also, she shouldn't be allowed to carry a firearm until she's been properly treated."

As for what will happen to Poe Biafra, it's anyone's guess. Captain Green is firm in her opinion on the matter. "She is delusional, she likes to create stories about people to justify her actions and she is a sick individual who has shown no remorse for what she done and continued to attack and threaten me since that night. She needs to be locked away for a long time." However, the concern for her is clear, even from the victim. "Ah hope she finally gets the help she needs in ordah tah keep herself an' othahs safe," DeSanta said honestly.

At this time, no date has been set for Mrs. Biafra's trial, but we will keep you posted on this continuing story.