Ask Alexis is a weekly column for readers to submit questions about love, sex, relationships, and other matters of the heart.  Each week, some of the more interesting submissions will be answered here by AP's resident expert, Alexis Diamond.  For this first column, three questions were posed based on real situations.

Dear Alexis.  My boyfriend and I have been dating for over four years now, and while I know he loves me, he won't say it.  I tell him that I love him all the time, and he just says stupid things back like, "same here" or "me too". All I want is to hear the words from time to time.  What should I do to get him to say it?   Staci

Dear Staci. First thing, stop spelling your name with an "i" and grow up.  You say you know he loves you even though he won't say it, but you still need to hear it?  It sounds to me like you have dependency issues and low self-esteem, why else would you need to hear what is, in reality, three little words.  Actions speak louder than words, and if he shows you he loves you, then be happy, because there are plenty of other women out there who would trade places with you.  If you can't accept it, then I strongly urge you to seek therapy before you grow into a bitter old shrew.
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Dear Alexis.  My wife and I have been happily married for almost fifteen years, but lately she does not seem to be as interested in sex as she use to be.  I have tried everything to rekindle the romance, including romantic dinners, a cruise, and I even suggested trying some role-play, but nothing seems to work.  I love my wife, but I miss the sex.  Friends have suggested I have an affair, but I couldn't do that.  I want my wife.  Please help.   Alan

Dear Alan.  Your wife is not interested in having sex with you after fifteen years of marriage, huh?  Well, that would put you into, or close to, middle age I assume, which says to me that maybe you need to take a good, hard look in the mirror.  Is there a spare tire starting to form around the middle?  Do you still take as careful care of your personal hygiene as you use to?  My guess is yes to the first and no to the second.  So stop trying to bribe your wife into sex and fix yourself.  Buy a new razor and use it.  It's called deodorant, get some.  Take a shower at least once a day.  And get off the couch and lose some weight.
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Dear Alexis.  I have been dating my boyfriend for about a year now, and recently his dad has started to hit on me when he isn't around.  I know it should be creepy, but the truth is, his dad is pretty attractive, and I kinda like the attention.  Anyway, I am not sure that my boyfriend in the one, and his mother is not in the picture, so should I see how far it will go with the father?  Tammy

Dear Tammy.  The answer is simple.  You already know the relationship with your boyfriend is doomed, so unless you are under eighteen, do the dad.  Older men can often be much better lovers due to their experience, and what they can show you could help you land "the one" when you meet him.  Just be aware that with dad, you will probably just be a plaything, so keep the emotions closed and the legs spread and enjoy.
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If you have a question that you would like Alexis to answer, mail it to AP Times, c/o Alexis Diamond.

Shots were fired Sunday night at the grand opening of Asphyxiation Point’s newest dating service, “A Perfect Match,” as a gunman decided to bring down the party, or at least take down one party goer for hitting on his companion. It didn’t take long for the large gathering to turn to violence as the short skirts and deep necklines provoked the altercation between a man identified as Zen Lee and an unknown biker who had made salacious comments to 'Flick the Bean' owner Sydney Lee.  

The APPD was, at first, slow to respond, leaving the locals in the crowd who had the foresight to remain armed left to guard the otherwise innocent bystanders while the gunman fired at the biker.  By the time the APPD arrived from the station, AP Hospital Chief Physician, Carson Capelo, was already trying to talk down the gunman while local residents were crouched around the scene for safety.  

It wasn’t until an unnamed local threw a shoe at the gunman’s head that APPD Chief Warwick DeSanta, leading the takedown, was able to act, and another was able to pull the gun away, but not before Lee had fired a second shot, this time into his own thigh.  The trouble wasn’t over however as the biker was left with the wrath of Sydney Lee and her pepper spray.  

Locals from town had this to say about the ruined event, “Again? This is why we can’t have nice things!” before walking away pouting over the ruined evening.  Zen Lee is being held in police custody at AP Hospital while the man who started it all just rolled away on his motorcycle.  All that this reporter knows is this:  Whoever is now missing a shoe, today you are this town’s hero.  

Reported by: Arizona Renfold

APPD Chief Warwick DeSanta in what appears to be pajamas with AP Hospital Chief Physician Carson Capelo.

Two would be heroes.

The deserted party left for workers to clean up.

An unidentified man was shot dead in Fredrick's restaurant Wednesday morning according to authorities. The incident occurred when a man charged into the establishment and began to fire his weapon. When the gun jammed the owner of Fredrick's, Vhiper Koskiniotis, disarmed, beat and then shot the assailant according to police reports.

Mr. Koskiniotis was arrested later that afternoon and placed into custody. Bail was set at $1 million for a charge of capitol murder. According to APPD Chief DeSanta, "The suspect had complied fully with the investigation." While Mr. Koskiniotis has made an official statement to the police, they still have no motive for the attack.

When asked about the events of that evening Mr. Koskiniotis claimed that the assailant's weapon had been switched into the 'safe' mode during the altercation and once the man was subdued he took the weapon and used it to kill the man.

"He shot two times. His gun jams, I get out because I had to protect my staff and my restaurant. We fought, I took his gun. He apparently had accidentally put it back on safe. I had him down, but he tried to grab his gun out of my hand. Out of panic, I fired." Vhiper Koskiniotis told the Times.

The Times has made various attempts to contact witnesses to the events with no real success. Most who were present or nearby are unwilling to go on record about the events. However. Police ask that if you have any information, or were witness to the incident, please contact authorities.

Reported by: Pen Dragon

A Perfect Match, AP's one and only computer dating service, would like to cordially invite everyone to attend our Grand Opening Meet & Greet Mixer.

Everyone is welcome to attend, but we strongly encourage all singles and casual visitors to join us.
Come and meet new people, enjoy free champaign, drinks and snacks, and while here, sign up to find your Perfect Match.

The party will kick-off at 5pm (SLT) on Sunday, Aug. 30 at the intersection of 2nd. and Foley Streets, beside the park.
Hosted by:  Alexis Diamond, Owner/President of APM, Inc.
                  Feebi, Senior Vice President

Drinks and snacks provided by Flick the Bean

We look forward to meeting all of you, and remember,
"Love doesn't make the world go 'round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile." - Franklin P. Jones

In the early evening hours of Sunday, August 24 the private helicopter of Pen Dragon exploded as it prepared for flight.
The pilot, Stringfellow Hawke, 50, of Washington, D.C. and two crew members, identified as Saint John Hawke, 42, and Dominic Santini, 64, were killed instantly in the blast. APFD and APPD arrived on scene just moments after receiving a 911 call.
 
 Mr. and Mrs. Dragon were to take the helicopter to the mainland for an afternoon of shopping and were almost ready to board the aircraft when it exploded. Neither were seriously injured. According to Mr. Dragon the helicopter had recently been serviced and should have had no mechanical problems that would have caused such a massive failure.

APFD apparently had to deal with a malfunctioning pump on their engine and brought in a Boeing CH-47 'Chinook' flown by Fire Department Chief Dean Anderson. The apparatus was used to dump a foam based fire suppressant to extinguish the flames, while Assistant Chief Uri Jefferson attempted to rescue any survivors, although none were found.

The explosion is under investigation at this time. No statements have been made as to rather it was mechanical failure, pilot error or intentional sabotage. Police officials ask that if you have any information about the incident to please contact them.

On a personal note: Jadey and I would like to thank Chief DeSanta, Fire Chief Anderson and Assistant Fire Chief Jefferson for their selfless duty in coming to our aid. We knew the crew well and this is a tragic day for us all. Jadey would also like to add that her dog, if you can call it that, Turtle was unharmed although she is saddened by the loss of one of her favorite negligee and several thousand dollars worth of shoes.

Reported by - Pen Dragon

Its easy to lose track of time when you are having fun. And so you may be forgiven for not noticing the date. This Saturday (8/22/2015), Asphyxiation Point will officially be 6 months old. There will be no OOC celebration, no fanfare. But we would like to share with you what an experience it has been and how we can do better still.

Asphyxiation Point opened its doors to the public on 2/22/2015. Since then we have been the fastest growing roleplay SIMs on Second Life with close to 1800 members in the main Asphyxiation Point group. That's an average increase of 300 group members per month or 10 group members a day !!!

We the admin team can by no means take credit for these amazing numbers. At the end of the day it is you - the roleplayers - who flesh the SIM out, give it character, and draw other roleplayers in. If you hadn't been such a great group we wouldn't have been able to drive and sustain this growth. Through your efforts, we are not just attracting folks from other roleplay SIMs, we are engaging folks who have never roleplayed in SL.

So yes... Firstly, a big THANK YOU to all of you !

But there is always room for feedback, always room for improvement, so we always want to hear from you. We are always available to talk to inworld but its easy to get bogged down with day-to-day activities when doing so. What we would like today is to hear what you love about Asphyxiation Point and how we can make Asphyxiation Point even more exciting.

Some of the areas we have already identified are :

1. Admin coverage : Please visit the Help Page for the latest list of admins. The list does change  so please keep referring back when looking for assistance.
2. Businesses : Most of the businesses on SIM now have active and steady leads. If you are a steady roleplayer on SIM, please consider applying too!
3. Factions : The neighborhood restriction has been lifted. Any three business leads may now apply to form a faction. Factions will be approved based on level of activity.
4. Events : This is one area where we feel we are lagging behind. If you are interested in organizing something, please reach out to the admin team. You wont be alone doing it. Our staff are more then willing to help in anyway possible.
5. Rentals : We have steadily added new rentals since opening. Please sign up for notifications as apartments come up for rent every week.
6. Rules : The rules have been simplified, streamlined and augmented since opening. Please take the time to browse through if you haven't done so in a while.
7. Lag : For those of you on older / ultra portable machines, the increased activity on SIM may be lagging you out. We hope the recently added Lag Guide will help !

 Once again, we can not thank you all enough for making Asphyxiation Point what it is.
 We hope the next 6 months go as well as the first!, we can't do it without you!

Asphyxiation Point is being stalked by a serial killer. Since May of this year three bodies have been discovered in the sewer tunnels beneath our island. All three victims were viciously murdered in a similar fashion and police believe it is the work of one individual they have dubbed 'The Drainpipe Killer.'

The first victim was an unidentifiable white male. His body was actually discovered in the lake, but marks on his body and forensic evidence showed that he had been in the sewer tunnels for some time before washing out into the open water. Police found the man after doing a sweep of the sewers during the investigation of the second victim.

The second victim, but the first body discovered, was identified as Lorelei Sharktooth. She was eighteen years old and a recent high school graduate with no criminal history and no known ties to Asphyxiation Point according to sources. Her mutilated body was found July 26th in the sewer tunnels close to The Aristocrat Club in Upper Town. The discovery was made by now deceased Detective Kenzie Barret who noticed a bloody trail that led from a cell phone in the street near a man hole cover. The body was nude and had been butchered almost beyond recognition.

Single life can be hard. Where do you go to find that special someone? The bar scene is old and you certainly aren't going to let your mother set you up.
The answer may have just opened it's door is Asphyxiation Point.  A Perfect Match, located on the corner of 2nd and Foley, is a new dating service for the people of AP. It's a brand new way to find that special someone, maybe even your soulmate.

The premise is simple. People can come to the office of A Perfect Match and fill out a questionnaire. The answers they supply will be run through a proprietary computer program. The program is designed to match individuals based on the answers and preferences they define in the questionnaire.
"There are twenty-six questions, with thirty answers, and unless at least twenty-seven match up, the program continues to search." she said, describing the questionnaire. According to Ms. Diamond the success rate of the program is about 80%.

Ms. Diamond addressed potential privacy concerns by implementing various safety features into the process of match making.
"Personal privacy is our number one priority. No one may see another's profile, ever.  For that matter, once the information
has been entered, the paper form is immediately shredded." she explained.

A Perfect Match is owned and run by Alexis Diamond, a relative new-comer to our island.  According to Ms. Diamond she saw a need for a dating service while making a visit to AP.
"I would notice people dining alone at the restaurant, or sitting by themselves in the park, so I started to watch and listen, and it seemed like there were a lot of single people here.  To me, that was depressing, so I asked myself what I could do to help, and viola, here I am." she continued, "My business plan is to make as many happy couples as I can."

Alexis Diamond resides just a short distance up the coast and had originally come to AP for a job.
"I had been looking for something to do when I saw an ad for models for Phyxation Fashion here on the island.  I came and was hired to do shows, but really loved the island, especially uptown, with the cafe and stores."

If you would like to start the services offered by A Perfect Match, you can call or stop by the main office at 1 Foley Street. A Perfect Match welcomes walk ins.

Reported by: Pen Dragon

In a somber proceeding, Asphyxiation Point Police Detective Kenzie Barret was laid to rest at the AP Non-Denominational Church. The funeral service was lead by Father Kobayashi. Members of the APPD as well as family and friends were in attendance.

Asphyxiation Point Police Chief Warwick DeSanta and sister of the slain officer Yasmin Everett spoke about Ms Barret with reverence and love. The ceremony was moved to the burial site by Sergent Jay Biafra as he made the final radio call to the Detective, a sobering police tradition. The ceremony ended with Chief DeSanta, Detective Madison Monroe, probationary officer Piper Comstock and Sergent Jay Biafra giving a three volley shotgun salute over her grave.

Detective Barret had been on the police force for 5 months. Working her way from probationary officer to Detective in the Major Crimes squad before being brutally murdered by an unknown assailant. Police are still investigating her murder and ask that anyone with any information contact them.

On behalf of myself and the employees of the AP Times, we offer our most sincere condolences to the family and friends of Ms Barrett.

Reported by - Pen Dragon

In an effort to give voice to the citizens of Asphyxiation Point the AP Times will begin featuring a weekly editorial section. This new feature will be comprised of opinion letters composed by our readers. We will feature three submissions a week, to be printed on Fridays.  Topics will be limited to events and news that occurs here on out island. If you wish to submit your letter, they can be sent to Pen Dragon (arthuris1974), Editor -in - Chief, AP Times