*How does one describe the Average Bay Area Resident? Various psychiatrists have tried and failed. Therefore it's no surprise that many once again find themselves tuned into the only local source for news and weather, Channel 68. As the channel cues up and the last bits of static clear into focus, one casts their eyes upon field reporter Kaylynn Garcia standing outside the courthouse smiling at the Camera.*
Kaylynn: “…After the announcement had been made on Monday, numerous business owners spent a good portion of the week on site filing the paperwork to obtain additional H two B visas for temporary foreign workers. Going into the fall season many of the visas already issued for the main tourist months are set to expire in November, and as swimming and boating season draws to a close, many businesses find they still have need of additional work forces, especially in the M-DOT and other labor intensive fields.”
*The Camera shows some footage of various persons filing into the courthouse and carrying papers, chatting idly and occupying most flat surface areas, even up against the walls to fill out forms. Then it cuts back to Kaylynn*
Kaylynn: “With immigration and other groups cracking down on foreign visitors and many being taken to be deported without proper identification papers, many are welcoming the additional allowance of these work visas. Others, however, are thinking it’s too little too late as many of their more skilled and trained workers have already gone or have been deported, and there’s even more paperwork needed to get them un-deported, and the costs may outweigh the experience offered. From downtown, this is Kaylynn Garcia, back to you Ari and Ray.”
*The camera cuts back to the main news desk where Ariana Bening and Raymond Wages sit.*
Raymond: “Thank you Kaylynn. It sounds like quite a messy situation to unravel. But it does explain why my neighbor might have taken off.”
Ariana: “You don’t mean the seventy year old woman with her garage painted like a door to Narnia do you?”
Raymond: “No the other one, Vjorn. The one who you said was ‘yummy’ and got my air conditioner to work again last year.”
*Ari blushes a bit when he calls her out on her comment and adjusts her papers as she looks at the main camera*
Ariana: “Preliminary hearings continue as more evidence is brought to light about a woman accused of what is now appearing to be a state-wide burglary spree. All throughout August, and perhaps as early as June, the accused is suspected of carrying out numerous burglaries and invasions of homes and vehicles stealing numerous valuables. At this point her alleged crimes cover most of the state and may even cross state borders and could have some international, as records show she may have traveled into Canada several times. At this point the individual jurisdictions are trying to determine where to hold the hearing, since her alleged crimes cross so many of them, and may simply remand them all to the State level. Her attorney has argued that if it’s remanded to the state level it denies her a level to appeal to that level which would be a violation of process.”
Raymond: “You can follow that story as we learn more, along with the roadmap of crime she’s alleged to have participated in on our website.”
*Raymond adjusts his papers and turns to the side Camera*
Raymond: “The final weekend in September has been named for the public build day for the Park Street Community Park. The land was donated to the city three years ago to commission a public park space, and donations over the past year have been used to expand this area to include a playground on site. All locals are encouraged to stop in and help assemble the park from Friday the twenty-ninth till the Thirtieth, though they have allowed for work to be finished up on Sunday the First of October if needed.”
Ariana: “I know many of us from the studio will be there helping to put up the swing sets and monkey bars.”
*She smiles and mock-flexes her arms as if indicating that she’s not afraid of some hard work.*
Raymond: “Quite. It seems to be a year for public buildings and spaces, as Wednesday of next week the grand Opening and garden party for the Shire House facility is scheduled rain or shine from Noon to Seven PM. It’s taken nearly six years for the organization behind the facility to obtain all the funding permits and actual assistance in building it to come to Fruition. They plan on opening for weekend events near the middle of October, and have plans for a community Halloween carnival at the end of the month. You can contact them for scheduling family or group events at the number or website listed below.”
*On the screen the website address and phone # for the facility scrolls along while Ray finishes speaking*
Ariana: “Speaking of Rain or Shine, Let’s check with Wilbert Woods and see what kind we should expect as that day rolls around. Which is it going to be there Wil?“
*The camera shifts over to the weather desk with Wilbert Woods standing in front of his green Screen with a nice sharp possibly new suit. Offset by the outrageously loud powder blue tie he’s got on.*
Wilbert: “Well Ari, as Jose winds himself down off the coast and Maria works her way on up, we are going to have all manner of unusual weather trends over the next weeks. At this time until the end of the month the coast guard has issued a wind Gust and high wave alert. This means that winds can shift from near calm to nearly forty miles per hour without warning, and some waves may swell ten feet or more above usual level due to the storms finishing their run. So if one is swimming or taking advantage of the last bouts of warm weather on the ocean, be aware and follow safety procedures like wearing life jackets and making sure you have all survival gear in good working order.”
*The screen behind him shows some background clips from Gilligan’s Island with various news staff members faces and heads overlaid on the actual actors, before switching to the week planner display*
Wilbert: “Today, Nice and sunny, only intermittent clouds high up in the sky, Highs in the Low to Mid-Eighties. Overnight, the weather cools off a bit but still has hot breezes as the tropical current finishes off, it shouldn’t get any colder than sixty degrees. Sunday and Monday are more of the same, as Jose finishes out and we have a brief bit of respite as Maria remains down in the gulf area. Warm days with lots of sun and few clouds, which will shift on Tuesday as we have a front from Canada moving in from the West, which will cool things down on Tuesday and Wednesday. Both days only seeing a high in the mid Sixties with lots of cloud cover.”
*The Screen shows behind him the weather tracker playing out over the course of the weekend and week, the swirls of Jose fading out, the clouds of the cold front coming in and the path estimated for Maria to head on up along during the latter part of the week*
Wilbert: “This Cold front will press against the warmer southerly winds preceding Maria’s travel up along the coast and could cause some thunderstorms scattered about the area as well as patches of rain here and there on Thursday and Friday. The Temperature rising back up to the low and mid Seventies the Sun peeking out here and there to keep us guessing as to whether or not we need an umbrella. As Maria heads back out to the Atlantic on Saturday and Sunday we see our weather shift with her course, more clouds and much cooler temperatures with the high not expected to be above Sixty two on Saturday or Sunday with numerous clouds, but very little in the way of Rainfall or storms.”
*The camera cuts back over to Ari and Ray*
Ariana: “Up and down and up and down, sounds like our days of swimming in the ocean and sunshine are dwindling down. Thanks Wil.”
Raymond: “For those who have been finding difficulties with phone reception on the outer islands and even some on the inner, there’s good news. Plans for several new cell phone towers to be built and in working order to cover the bay area with better coverage have been approved by the various planning commissions and work is due to begin this winter as weather permits. The companies are hopeful that they will have all the towers up and running in time for the onset of Tourist season Mid-April of twenty-eighteen.”
Ariana: "Dean Knopinski is out for minor surgery this weekend, we all wish him a speedy recovery and that they get all of the foreign object removed from his soft tissue without too much scarring."
Raymond: "Coming up after the break, Series of fires along a block of High street, negligence, coincidence, or serial arson attempt? Jail library sending out request for volunteer workers to distribute books to inmates, why they need to ask for Volunteers for the job, and how you can help. "
Ariana: "The Peak of Tourist season may be past, but the bay Area is still scheduled to receive over a hundred cruise ships between now and November First, what this means for your local fall hot spots and the economy. And a Former pastor found guilty of possessing child pornography, how he was caught and what his sentence will be, all that and more after these words from our sponsors."
~~Cut to Commercials~~
*This is a story of two Worlds - the one we know and keep all our stuff in, and another which exists just beneath the surface, out of sight and out of mind till one cues up the television for the daily dose of reality through the screen to inflict itself upon your senses. This is the outside world, and the world next door, this is Channel 68 Local news. Any resemblance to any other world known or unknown is purely coincidental.*
*As the static clears and the screen finalizes upon that which it shall inflict itself upon your senses, we see one Tammi Bean. Blond hair up in pigtails bouncing to and fro as she talks and moves her head in exaggerated motions. Her outfit is absolutely crazy, consisting as it does of what one could say is what would happen if Strawberry Shortcake had a illegitimate lovechild with Lolita that proceeded to explode all over Scarlett O’Hara and had then been iced and glazed. A short poofy skirt with cupcake prints on a bright pink background, with a tight top that if it showed a quarter inch more cleavage would cause the censors to break out the black bars to hide what it revealed, all of it underneath a bright lemon yellow apron with “Sweet stuff inside” printed on the front. She’s standing in front of rows and rows of various delectable treats lined up for display in a bakery some under glass, some on platters, others set out to tempt the senses.*
Tammi Bean: “…So..like although the Pink Pastry shop isn’t set up to deliver all over the islands yet, the two new shops that have opened can like, deliver to the local area, and they even have a nifty little web app you can use to order most anything they sell! How neat is that!? You don’t even need to get up and come on down to satisfy your cream filling sweet tooth!”
*She Giggles and waves at the camera with a over-iced cupcake that has to be the size of a softball as the camera cuts back to the news desk with Ariana Bening and Raymond Wages sitting there.*
Raymond: “Uhm…Yes Tammi, I’ll…Uh keep that in mind the next time I have a hankering for a Bear Claw or Apple Fritter…”
*Ariana seems to collect herself as the camera focuses on her*
Ariana: “Sad news for the Barn Art’s Collective today as a stop work order remains in effect for their use of a boat storage facility for their planned upcoming performance. The Show Won’t go on, as the review application for use of the facility in the upcoming presentation of ‘Cabaret’ was found to be incomplete by the town’s planning board. At this time the performance has not been re-scheduled. For Pre-purchase of tickets to obtain a refund please contact the number on your ticket.”
Raymond: “And now with a look at all things on the waterfront, we go to Jeannie Webb.”
*The Camera cuts over to Jeannie standing on one of the docks with the bay behind her outlined by the rising sunlight.*
Jeannie: “Thank you Ray, behind me it looks calm and collected, but in less than twenty-four hours over one-hundred and three Lobster Boats are going to participate in the Winter Harbor Lobster Boat Races. This event has been ongoing and this will be the Fifty-second year it takes place. Several crews already are getting into the spirit, and numerous early birds have already set up camp on the best lookout spots to watch the race.”
*The camera shows several stock videos of campsites with people cheering and drinking. Several boat crews prepping the lobster boats and catcalling when they see the camera, a few of them striking dramatic weight lifter poses on the gunnels. *
Jeannie: “earlier next week the Bass harbor mackerel Derby opens up with Weigh in starting at Noon and ending at five PM. The actual fishing begins at nine so even more boats will be out and about as Bass harbor is filled with aspirants hoping to claim that trophy and purse. Just a reminder all fish must be caught in Bass harbor the day of the tournament and you must sign up early to qualify.”
Jeannie: “Another bit of waterfront news, harsher penalties for violations of state fishing laws has passed in Augusta and Go into effect September First. This includes steeper penalties for violations including harsher fines and fees and up to more stringent jail time. The full listing can be found on the State’s website as well as a link on our own. I’ve also posted a direct link on my Chatter account check it out! And a Good day on the water from me!”
*The bottom of the screen shows a Chatter listing of %CH68JeannieW as the camera cuts back to Ari and Raymond at the news desk.*
Ariana: “Thank you Jeannie, and I certainly do hope that the problems they had last year in the race won’t be repeated.”
Raymond: “Just a reminder, the Coast Guard is sponsoring first aid and CPR classes at local hospitals throughout the month of September. Check their website or the local hospital for times and availability. You never know when what you learn may save a life.”
Ariana: “Speaking of lifesaving, Wilbert Woods has some weather for us as well as I believe an advisory? What manner of things is Mama Nature tossing our way Wil?”
*The camera cuts on over to Wilbert Woods at the weather desk, behind him is a big flashing red “HIGH SURF ADVISORY!” message as he flashes a smile at the camera*
Wilbert: "That's right the national weather service has issued a High surf advisory for the bay area lasting all through today and ending Saturday morning. At this time due to weather conditions the surf may swell unexpectedly six to ten feet without warning. This will cause potential dangerous rip currents so for those at the beach close to shore be advised and pay attention if the lifeguards issue a warning. Also those on rocks above the water need to take care as waves can swell up and knock them off into the water below and drag them back out to the ocean. Coast guard advised everyone swim or sunbathe near the shore with a buddy who can call for help if needed."
*The screen behind him changes from the Alert to the normal weather screen*
Wilbert: "Despite all that the cause of all these waves is far off shore at this time and won't have an actual impact on the weather directly. The front has moved on out to sea at this time and left us with some pretty nice days ahead. Today highs in the Mid eighties and steady winds between five and ten miles per hour. Overnight dipping to Upper sixties in temperature. Tomorrow, Much of the same, though we may hit ninety or ninety one degrees as a high in later afternoon. Saturday will have more clouds moving in, and the temperature will drop down to the mid seventies during the day as those clouds thicken overnight. Leading to Sunday morning and all through the day the temperature picks back up again into the Low Eighties, but intermittent storms may pop up here and there but not linger for very long. "
*The background image changes to the Weekday planner mode*
Wilbert: "Monday, lots of sunshine with sparse clouds, but cooler temperatures as they dip into the middle seventies, overnight dropping down to Fifty-two degrees in some places. Tuesday is more of the same, including temperature levels. Though Tuesday night there may be some more pop up showers, especially along the northern parts of the state. Wednesday and Thursday at the end of the month the Temperature springs back up to the mid Eighties during the day on both days giving a nice last burst of summer weather and giving way on Friday the First to Darker storm clouds rolling in in the early morning and rain with intermittent thunderstorms all through the day to herald September having arrived. And that's what to expect from the weather, back to you Ray and Ari."
Ariana: "Thank you Will. For many islands and townships in the bay area landfills can be a big problem on what to do with once they have reached capacity. Currently just burying everything under mounds of dirt and letting it decompose has been what we have done, but one of the larger islands has an idea for what else to do with that land. For that Story we go to Dean Knopinski in the field. Dean?"
*The camera cuts to Dean standing at a fairly open landfill site with bulldozers and trucks moving about tilling mounds of garbage and shoving it into great piles to be sorted*
Dean: "Thank you Ari, Following previous measures for ecologically friendly refuse disposal the landfill here behind me has already been sorting the incoming waste for recycling materials and organic components. Separating the Trash from the reclaimable materials. But per federal mandate and standards the land used for such disposal cannot be used for any kind of accommodating housing or businesses due to the land itself being registered unstable for at least a hundred years. Decomposing refuge can cause gas pockets and other shifts underneath a foundation which could endanger lives. And despite all the recycling, this fill site is soon due to be closed due to running out of space."
*The camera shows stock footage from overhead views and Shots taken from a Bulldozer as it Rams mounds of decomposing waste into a pile*
Dean: ~Voiceover~ "numerous proposals on what to do with this site after it's reached it's limit have been proposed, everything from a community garden, to simply letting nature reclaim the land itself."
*it cuts back to Dean walking gingerly along the Ground along with the camera*
Dean: "That's where ACTT has a proposal coming up soon before the board of Selectmen for this area to instead of letting the land sit fallow, instead let it bring in a harvest of sunlight. Their proposal is to set up several dozen solar power stations on site sinking poles down nearly a hundred feet into the ground to secure them and getting the island well on it's way to being independent of Energy from the mainland. If the proposal is approved they intend on surveying the site next year to find the best places to ~BLEEEEP~ "
his next words are cut off as he takes another step and suddenly sinks down neck deep into a batch of decomposing refuse that was just under the surface, a large "FAAAAAAARRRRRRPPPP" noise billows up as escaping gas blows up along his face and body making his hair look a lit like he just became a Super Saiyan as the camera cuts back to the News desk.*
Raymond: "I'm sure he'll be fine." *He turns to face camera center* "Speaking of Power and electricity, Underwater utility workers have determined a blown fuse is the cause of main power going out on five islands in the bay area at the start of the week. The main distribution line feeding the underwater cable that supplies power to several islands including Seal cove and Swans' island was not listed as being damaged and power was restored with minimal hassle yesterday."
*The camera cuts to center on Ariana as she adjusts some papers in front of her*
Ariana: “Coming up after the break, Kaylynn Garcia with the latest series, ‘Out About Town’ where she looks at the little stories that affect the local citizens directly.”
*The camera shows a split screen of Kaylynn standing there on one side of the screen in front of a nondescript building*
Kaylynn: “That’s right. Today’s Out About Town we check on the current status of the Cruise ship moratorium and how that affects local tourism. A new series of jobs for parking lot attendants to enforce customer only parking during peak hours. And another Bed and Breakfast gets it’s permits denied, the why’s and what this means for you. All this and more, after these messages.”
~~*Both her and Ari smile at the camera as the image cuts to the commercial break.*~~
*You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you still remember dreaming? Between Bed and that First mug of Coffee, that place where you aren't quite ready for a shower? That's where the TV turns on and Eyes tune into the local CH 68 For news and weather. Somehow you find yourself here as the scene comes up.*
*Standing at the familiar sight of the Coast Guard Dispatch Center where numerous uniformed DEA officers are unloading what looks like large tubs sealed with red "Evidence Seal" tape is Kaylynn Garcia, the camera panning around to show several other men being loaded into a large Police truck to be taken away*
Kaylynn: "Campbell returned to port after a two month counter drug cruise with Coast guard naval officers and DEA officials on board. During this time they have seized an estimated one-hundred Sixty million dollar haul in illegal drugs. Primarily cocaine and Heroin that was being smuggled on board numerous vessels. As you can see behind me the crew of the last ship seized in this endeavor are being taken away for processing and questioning, and the narcotics will be held as evidence and eventually disposed of."
*The Screen shows some file footage of video taken of the Various drugs piled up outside the containers as if on display with many bricks of the illegal substances before cutting back to Kaylynn*
Kaylynn: "The Coast Guard and DEA report that no agents were killed in the two month endeavor, and only one injured when he slipped on a wet deck and fell on his side fracturing his arm in the process. Live from Coast Guard Bay area dispatch, I'm Kaylynn Garcia."
*The camera cuts back to the main news desk with Ariana Bening and Raymond Wages*
Raymond: "Quite an impressive haul. Nearly two hundred million in illegal narcotics. Bet that put somebody in a bad mood south of the border."
Ariana: "Not all drugs come from south of the border Ray." *She smirks as he rolls his eyes a bit* "But speaking of things that do come across the borders. Here's Tammi Bean filling in for Wilbert Woods with the latest weather coming in from Canada and all points south. Tammi?"
*The camera pans over to Tammi standing in front of the weather map...holding her hand up with a little Sock puppet on it making "Rawr Rawr" Noises and Miming the puppet biting at the Precipitation radar clouds. Wearing her usual revealing outfit just this side of shameless with low front and high skirt, and a scarf about her neck that in front of the Screen blacks out her neck and part of her shoulder as being part of the background. Poor girl hasn't learned not to wear green in front of the screen yet.*
Tammi: "Rawr...Rawr...Chomp Chomp take that green stuff....Hrm?!?" *She looks up blinking as somebody tells her that's her cue* "Oh...OH! HIIIII Everybody! " *She turns and waves the sock puppet at the screen it's eyes googling all over the place as she does* "That's right we have lots and lots of weather coming in...I really don't know where we're going to put it all! Hopefully we can give a lot of it away before we get filled up with all this. Anyway! "
*She Smiles big and moves like Vanna White to motion to the board...Remembering the Sock puppet and taking it off her hand to stick down her front so she has a Googly-eyed monster bursting out of her ample cleavage*
Tammi: "So for today we have Really really good temperature circles. Like lots of them even with all the rain and clouds. getting to be in the Eighty-five little circles by the afternoon! But the rain keeps coming all through the day making it really difficult to enjoy the heat. Tomorrow those clouds stick around but let up to be just cloudy in the afternoon with the temperature sending us lots of little circles, getting near ninety of them! But with a lot of humidity...That's going to make my hair look all poofy....Heh...Poofy...POOOfy..."
*She seems to drift off a bit stroking her hair and then blinks*
Tammi: "Oh yes...Wednesday is when the sun comes back for tanning with light clouds all over and ninety three little circles as the high amount. But Thursday has to be a buzzkill and bring back rain and clouds and other showers with only Seventy Nine little circles for us." *She pouts and stops bouncing a bit but the googly eyes on the puppet keep moving* "And Friday isn't much better with bringing in some thunder storms and cold winds only Seventy Five little circles expected that day. which is still a lot but not nearly as good as Wednesday. Then Saturday and Sunday come along to save the day with sunshine and back to Eighty nine and Ninety Eight little circles to make for a big happy weekend! So lets everybody say Yaaay for Wednesday and Saturday and Sunday for being great and booo on Thursday and Friday for not playing nice!"
*The camera cuts back over to Aria and Ray who are trying to keep from laughing it seems*
Raymond: "As always Tammi, thank you and well done." *The camera focuses more on Ray as Ari covers her Mic and holds her hand over her mouth to muffle her giggles* "have you visited Arcadia Park recently? If so you might have seen new signs put up prohibiting Electric Bicycles on certain trails. With that story we go to Dean Knopinski. Dean?"
*The camera cuts to Dean holding his microphone with one hand, a Electric motor powered bicycle with his other hand standing in front of the sign prohibiting electric or other motorized vehicles o the trail behind him*
Dean: "Thanks Ray. Electric bicycles have become increasingly popular here in the last couple of years, especially with people who don’t have as much strength or stamina as they used to but would still like to cycle around the park. The Rangers say that's fine, so long as they stick to the paved roads such as Big Loop, Small Loop or any of the Gravel firetrail roads. But electric bikes are not permitted on the park’s 45-mile network of carriage roads."
*The camera shows a Overview map of the park indicating which roadways are listed as such marked out in brilliant Orange on the relief with Dean speaking in voiceover*
Dean: ~Voiceover~ "Park regulations state that the carriage roads are closed to all motorized vehicles except for sections of roads where snowmobiles are allowed. Originally conceived and designed as a way of enjoying the mountains and lakes separate from motor vehicles. Visitors can travel the historic carriage road system with its bridges and gatehouses and have a truly unique experience free from the distraction of motor vehicles. The ban applies to
modes of transportation with internal combustion engines and to electric vehicles such as Segways, eBikes and hoverboards."
*As each method is listed a Image of them appears on the screen with a "No" X Marking them out as the Image Cuts back to Dean on the trail entrance*
Dean: "The management challenge has been in determining what constitutes a motor vehicle. Electric bikes are equipped with a lithium-ion battery and a motor that supplements the rider’s own muscle power, providing an extra boost. You can set it up for whatever terrain you’re riding, If it’s hilly, there’s a power mode that helps get you up over the hills. It’s about being able to make the hills without moaning the whole time."
*he demonstrates the different settings on the handlebars and then Climbs on the bike Starting to move away as the camera keeps on him*
Dean: "So the next time you want to take grandpa or Grandma out for a ride make sure you OMPH!!! ~~BLEEEEP~~"
*He curses as the bike propells him into a low hanging branch near the edge of the pathway. Clotheslining him and sending him falling backwards...Keeping his Grip on the handlebars the bike topples up on it's hind wheel and flips with him landing on top of him and Still running with a WHRRRRRR noise kicking up some dirt and gravel. The Camera cutting back to the News Desk*
Raymond: "I'm sure he'll be fine."
Ariana: "One of the stories we have been following is a Hike on sales tax coming before the State legislation when it comes to the selling of Recreational marijuana. Several localities still have it legalized for recreational sales, and now representatives at the state level, many from districts that have enacted a moratorium on it, are pushing legislation to add an additional sales tax on it similar to the hike done to cigarette sales over the past years. There's no word on whether the governor will sign this legislation if it passes or not. We'll have a full story on that after the break."
Raymond: "Also after the Break. Cruise Ship Moratorium for docking. Why you may be waiting a long time before seeing the big ships pulling up and disembarking passengers. Whale Deaths Raise Concerns. Oceanographers are concerned about six whales on the critically endangered list having been found dead, what this may mean and the suspected cause. Also the Skipper finally sentenced for shooting a seal. And of course Nacho Mama's Vandalized with numerous posters stuck to the outside with the words 'Szechuan sauce matters!' So far no group has taken responsibility or claim for this or what it means. More on that and more, after these messages. "
~Cut to Commercials~
~Wednesday July 12, 2017
*Once more viewer, you find yourself, the remote in hand, feet up on the couch, Second cup of morning coffee at hand and thus you tune into everyone's favorite local source for news and weather together, AP Local 68, the picture starting with Jeannie Webb standing out on a seaside dock wearing a rather revealing bikini top and behind her several different names such as "Caribou Dancer" and "Magic Bus" along with what has to be time scores keep shifting on a scoreboard*
Jeannie: "...Oh Another time penalty applied...at this point the International One Design starts tomorrow is going to be anyone's guess as to who is going to take first place. I'll make sure to keep everyone updated on my Chatter and our Website. This is Jeannie from the Halfway point in Northeast harbor!"
*The camera cuts back to the Main News Desk with The familiar faces of Raymond Wages and Ariana Bening sitting there. *
Raymond: "Thanks Jeannie. As you say it's anyones Game at this point. It'll be interesting to see how things turn."
Ariana: "And as the boats turn and go so does our seasonal weather. To give you a update on what to expect this week if you plan on going out and doing anything, Here's Wilbert Woods."
*The camera cuts on over to Wilbert standing in front of his usual weather screen. The brace still in place on his back though it seems he's moving a bit better now*
Wilbert: "Thank you Ari. Looks lie this week is fairly usual for this time of year if a bit hotter than normal. Today we have light clouds and winds with the temperature getting up to a Fairly impressive ninety two, dropping back to seventy eight as nighttime settles in. Thursday, more clouds and a high in the upper eighties, overnight the temperature drops back to the Sixties as we get occasional pop up showers."
*The screen behind him shows the breakdown of temperatures and forecasts for the days each one highlighting as he speaks*
Wilbert: "Friday we are back in the Eighties maybe hitting ninety during the afternoon, winds calming down and after midnight the rain slips back on in clearing up Saturday morning. Saturday is hot muggy and Humid with temperatures in the Upper eighties, but with the humidity it'll feel like it's in the mid nineties. The clouds stick around from Saturday on into Sunday, with the temperature cooling down to the upper seventies as random pop up thunderstorms show up across the bay area. Those Storms blow themselves out after midnight and going into Monday we have it hot humid and sunny in the upper eighties and low nineties. Sunshine will be prevalent on Monday and Tuesday with light variable winds. he temperature in the afternoon will be high and dropping rapidly overnight so each day we wake up with the temperatures in the sixties. Till Wednesday rolls around and the clouds roll back in helping moderate the temperature keeping it in the low to mid Eighties. "
*The camera moves back on over to Raymond and Ari*
Ariana: "Thank you Wilbert...sounds great...other than what the humidity is going to do to my hair."
*She chuckles and the camera centers in on Raymond*
Raymond: "Hitting a little closer to home. Lower town Asphyxiation Point was rocked yesterday by a explosion. Outside of the greasy spoon diner near the last Chance gas station a vehicle reported to be a Van exploded yesterday afternoon. Emergency crews were slow to respond and Only Four were reported injured by the blast. One unnamed male who was treated at the hospital and released. A Waitress at the diner who declined permission for us to use her name who was caught by some glass fragments from the window that broke. And two unnamed persons who were near the van at the time of the explosion who are still not identified to our station. The police have yet to issue a statement on the incident so instead we turn to our Criminology and Forensic Analyst correspondent, Sarai Segrest."
*The camera changes to visual on a small desk and office with nondescript background. Numerous textbooks are on the shelves behind some of them psychology books others History of Forensic analysis, and case-file studies. All kinds of "light" reading for someone studying Forensics. Sitting at the desk with her hands folded and a light smile is a somewhat round in the face woman who looks a bit younger than she might be because of the glasses and hairstyle. She holds up a hand in a bit of a wave as the camera settles in on her*
Sarai: "Thank you Raymond. Always a pleasure to provide whatever manner of insight I can for you. "
*She adjusts some papers on the desk in front of her and addresses the camera directly*
Sarai: "Yes well as many people know recently there has been a great deal of speculation about this group calling themselves Immortals who have it seems done a great deal of mayhem in Asphyxiation Point and the surrounding area. I've been researching which manner of terrorist groups they may be affiliated with and when asked by the television if perhaps this bombing is something they could have done. The answer is possibly. In my research I found a news story from Hathian mentioning a young lady who had a collar on her neck who went into the police station. The collar had explosives in it. Which means that explosives are not outside the normal modus operandi of this group."
*She picks up a printout of the clipping and reads a bit*
Sarai: "One Briony Privette came into the police station claiming the collar was placed there by one of the Immortals, who stated that she belonged to them from this point forward. The collar was disarmed and safely disposed of by bomb specialists. after a tense period where they evacuated the building."
*She sets the paper down and looks back at the camera*
Sarai: "Naturally no detailed analysis can be done till the remains of the vehicle are examined but if I had to speculate I'd say that the explosion wasn't intended to be a car bomb. Your eyewitness in the diner stated that the Van had been driven up to where it was. The driver got out and then the explosion. if it had been intended as some kind of assassination attempt they would ahve rigged the explosive o go off when the man was inside the vehicle. Simple reasoning says you don't want the target outside unless you have enough explosives packed inside to sink the entirety of the lower city. "
*She smiles softly and taps her fingers on the desk while considering*
Sarai: "If the case had been one of these exploding collars, then perhaps the driver was trafficking another victim captured who didn't believe the collar would explode, and tried to take it off and had the entire thing explode unexpectedly. Or perhaps if it was an attempted terrorist act, the driver opened the back to check the detonator system and it went off without him intending for it to. Mainly based on the fact that there's really nothing there worth blowing up. One of the truisms of the job is that if you have a bomb you have someone wanting to make a statement. There's nothing of value that was damaged or could have been damaged down there, and the bomb wasn't rigged to explode with someone sitting inside the vehicle so that rules out both murder and intended statement. Thus we are left with accidental discharge. Perhaps when they wake up and can provide a statement the driver can tell us what he intended to blow up or why. Or if the Police investigation manages to find other human remains in the wreck, we may have a clue as to what may be going on there."
*She shrugs slightly and the camera cuts back to split between her office and the Newsroom*
Sarai: "Until then all we can do is make suppositions and go from there."
Raymond: "Thank you Sarai, I look forward to hearing some more of your research analysis in the upcoming featurettes."
Sarai: "Always a pleasure"
*The camera cuts away from her office and back to the main news desk*
Raymond: "We will have updates on Sarai's Featurettes on our website and her video blog as she researches and digs into this current terrorist threat to our community. There's also a link to subscribe and keep up to date with her other projects."
*The camera focuses a bit more on Ari as she adjusts her seating position*
Ariana: “Dean Knopinski is out today due to blunt force trauma and mild concussion…”
Raymond: “Well he did take a bit of a tumble down that hill…”
Ariana: “And of course was fairly badly battered by those Mama Seals thinking he might go after their pups…”
Raymond: “Didn’t help he took the flotation ring from the rescue crew right between the eyes, Anyway we wish him a speedy recovery. Covering some more distressing news out of the statehouse is Kaylynn Garcia. Kaylynn?”
*The Camera splits to Show Kaylynn standing outside the statehouse wearing her official looking jacket and Press pass for the facility as it cuts to her entirely*
Kaylynn: “Thank you Raymond. And in fact it is rather distressing news, just earlier the Health officials here at the State House confirmed that for the first time in twenty years the state has a case of measles. The fact that there are numerous locations that the public could have been exposed to this very contagious virus is troublesome.”
*The camera cuts to several previously recorded shots of the press briefing done earlier with members of the Maine CDCP Showing images of the patient and various posters indicating locations in the state that may be at risk as Kaylynn continues in voiceover*
Kaylynn: ~Voiceover~ “The individual who has not yet been named for privacy concerns seems to have contracted the disease while traveling overseas. The list below are the locations and times that the public may have been exposed to the patient and virus they are carrying. The list will also be available on our website as well as the Maine Center for Disease Control and Prevention website.”
*Scrolling along the bottom of the Screen are the following lists of locations and times:
— Narrow Gauge Cinema, Farmington, Maine, 4 to 9 p.m. Friday, July 7
— Grantlee’s Tavern and Grill, Farmington, Maine, 7 to 11 p.m. Friday, July 7
— Farmington Farmers Market, Farmington, Maine, 8 a.m. to 2 p.m. Saturday, July 8
— The Kingfield Woodsman, Kingfield, Maine, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. Sunday, July 9
— Restaurant la Chocolaterie, Lac-Megantic, Quebec, Canada, noon to 4 p.m. Monday, July 10
— Franklin Memorial Hospital Emergency Department, 8 to 10:30 p.m. Monday, July 10
— Franklin Memorial Hospital Laboratory, Midnight to 2:30 A.m., Tuesday, July 11
*The camera cuts back to Kaylynn standing in front of the Statehouse.*
Kaylynn: “Health officials recommended that individuals who were potentially exposed review their vaccine history and monitor for symptoms. Those experiencing symptoms should contact their health care providers for instructions before arriving at the providers’ offices or at hospitals. This is to help keep those who may not have been inoculated or exposed from becoming so. Symptoms of measles include a fever, cough, runny nose and red eyes, followed by a rash that begins on the head and spreads down the body. While most people recover from the virus, it can cause severe health complications including pneumonia, encephalitis and even death.”
*She tries not to put too much emphasis on the death part, but can’t really help it. Putting a smile back on her face as she continues glancing at the information card in her hand.*
Kaylynn: “Measles is so contagious that 90 percent of people who are not immune can catch it from being in close proximity to an infected person, and spreads when an infected person coughs or sneezes. The measles virus can survive for up to two hours in the air and on surfaces. Infected people are contagious from four days before the rash begins through four days after it appears. Symptoms typically begin ten to fourteen days after exposure to the virus but sometimes up to twenty-one days later, so travelers may not realize they’re infected until after returning home!”
*She looks back up at the Camera and continues smiling, not nearly as forced this time.*
Kaylynn: “If you have your MMR vaccine then you are protected against all strains of Measles, and thankfully Maine has one of the highest vaccination rates in the country with nearly ninety six percent of all children vaccinated. From the State house in Augusta, I’m Kaylynn Garcia!”
*The camera cuts back on over to the main news desk*
Raymond: “Frightening stuff, and it really has been twenty years since the last case.”
Ariana: “That’s why it’s good to get your vaccinations.”
Raymond: “Coming up after the break, Got some old electrical equipment gathering dust in your place? Find out where you can take it to be recycled at no cost to you. And the Tip credit bill finally signed into law, find out how this affects your lovely hostess the next time you go out.”
Ariana: *Rolling her eyes a bit* “And now that the city board has turned down the proposal of more parking meters, find out what other ways the Parking Solutions task force intends to handle congestion during tourist season. All that and more, after these words from our sponsors.”
*Cut to Commercials*
*Once again the familiar channel surfing brings up the CH 68 Local news. The opening picture is of Jeannie Webb standing at the familiar Coast Guard dispatch docks with a half-submerged fishing boat with crews attaching “floaties” to the sides to keep it from going fully under.*
Jeannie: “…in the vicinity of Bear Island when the captain radioed for assistance with the ship taking on water around noon. The boat hit a submerged object and started flooding more than the pumps could handle. The Coast Guard dispatched support craft and additional pumps and were able to tow the boat back to dock safely. None of the crew were hurt, and once the floatation bumpers are installed the boat will be towed by a tug to the drydock facilities where it can be inspected and hopefully repaired. This has been Jeannie Webb.”
*The camera cuts back to the AP Ch 68 newsroom with Ariana Bening and Raymond Wages at the news desk.*
Raymond: “Once again the Coast Guard comes in to save the day. I wonder what they hit? I’d say it was Nessie, but we’re a bit far from Scotland.”
*Ariana gives him a wry look even as she chuckles*
Ariana: “Could be, but with the way the weather has been of late, it could have been anything and they just couldn’t see it with all the silt stirred up. Speaking of what to expect, here’s Wilbert Woods back finally and ready to give us the forecast. Welcome back Wil, what does the wind surfing forecast have in store?”
*The camera cuts over to Wilbert Woods wearing his usual stylish suit and tie at the Weather center, only a strapped on neck brace and his firm positioning stance shows he’s strapped into a full back brace beneath the jacket to keep from further damaging his spine.*
Wilbert: “Well I don’t know about Wind surfing for the near future, but we do have some good news on the weather front.”
*The green screen behind him shows a Photoshopped image of Wilbert as some kind of cyborg with blank robotic stare and a word balloon: “Beep beep, all your weather is belong to us, beep” floating above it. As usual it doesn’t seem to be the same image Wil sees on his monitor.*
Wilbert: “The cold front that had been moving through the area finally passes through later on today and early tomorrow, making it a Chilly but sunny Saturday with the highs in the Upper sixties, and lows in the upper fifties overnight. Sunday we start off with clear skies and sunshine, with several clouds trailing in the wake of that front blowing in by the afternoon, pushing the temperature up into the upper seventies with moderate winds in the fifteen to twenty-five miles per hour range. Overnight the temperature drops to the mid-sixties. Monday, those clouds stick around causing the temperature to keep rising, reaching a high in the low eighties, later on in the afternoon several scattered thunderstorms develop here and there, but don’t linger around too long. This intermittent rain and storms will continue on into the night, though the temperatures remain high only dropping to the upper sixties.”
*He keeps indicating several bouts of weather on the radar with his hand showing the clouds moving through and fading back out. Here and there little cartoon figures seem to be wind-surfing on the clouds only to be “smacked” off and crash as Wil motions to them.*
Wilbert: “Tuesday morning those storms begin to pass on out, and the temperature reaches the mid Eighties in the afternoon with the skies clearing out. Overnight it stays warm and in the low seventies. Wednesday and Thursday both are warm and with mostly sunny skies temperatures in the upper eighties perhaps even hitting the ninety degree mark on Thursday afternoon. Later on Thursday those clouds roll back in causing intermittent lingering showers and a couple of storms that may get a little close to severe after the midnight hour. Those showers stick around into Friday morning causing a bit of a Chill from the rain and winds dropping the temperatures back into the upper sixties, sticking around into Saturday with a High of the low Seventies later on Saturday afternoon. Those showers continue on into the nighttime hours and should make for a wet and colder weekend. Remember you can download and install the local weather app on your phone from the link on our website.”
*The camera cuts back to Ari and Raymond*
Ariana: “Not a bad prospect for getting out and doing some things during the week. I bet that’s the kind of news our field reporters like to hear.”
Raymond: “Naturally, and with the cold front moving on out, so has fishing season for the Atlantic Menhaden. With that story we go to Dean Knopinski."
*The camera cuts to a moderate Fishery where workers are unloading fishing ships with buckets of silvery-white Fish some the size of a hand others at least a foot long being scooped out of the holding tanks and transported into the waiting fishery. Dean stands outside wearing a poncho despite the weather and looking a little distrustfully at the various goings on.*
Dean: "Uhrm yes of course. The Atlantic Menhaden, also known as the Pogy, isn't a fish usually used for eating. It's usually processed into fertalizer, pet food, and Fish oil of which it's abundant. Likewise smaller fishermen that catch them will turn around and sell them as bait for other types of fishing. This has been the case since the times of the natives, and it's even commonly believed that Squanto demonstrated how to use it for fertilizer for the Pilgrims when they were settling."
*He Jumps to the side as one of the Ropes used to guide the buckets flops down with a wet SPLOOSH where he had just been standing*
Dean: "Ah..Um..Well anyways, The Fish at one time had a massive dwindling population due to over fishing and other causes, so a strict limit of nearly two-hundred thousand pounds is in place to prevent over-fishing of the species. They have just reached that level according to the latest tallies and the season is considered closed."
*Suddenly without warning one of the Buckets moving around from the ship veers and hits against a guide-rail. Dean glances up and Lets out something that the Censors ~BLEEP~ out and Jumps back. The bucket of squirming thrashing fish tips over and dumps itself all over where he had been standing. Those with a Quick eye will see him looking almost triumphant for a minute before he realized he stepped back out of the way right of the side of the dock and as the camera races over to look down into the water he can be seen bobbing around in the oily grimy filled with fish scales and other detritus pumped out of the hold for unloading that's floating on the water below. Before the camera cuts back to the News Desk.*
Raymond: "I'm sure he'll be okay. But amazingly enough speaking of things in the water, Kaylynn Garcia has an interesting story from Avalon National park, Specifically Bar Island. Kaylynn?"
*The camera cuts to Kaylynn as she stands out among the various little natural carved benches and trails anyone familiar with bar Island would know of.*
Kaylynn: "Thank you Ray, Many know bar Island as a place for picnics, summertime walks and secluded beaches where many a marriage proposal has been made. But the national park service has changed it's policies should you find yourself stranded."
*The image shows a CGI modded map of the Island and park shoreline. Showing a Strip of Sandbar that appears at Low tide and then sinks beneath the water during High-tide as Kaylynn speaks in voiceover*
Kaylynn: ~Voiceover~ "Bridge Path, or the Sand bar that connects the island to the mainland at low tide is the only way to get from the park to the island on a regular basis. Staying that way for over nine hours once the tide rolls in, in the past if you missed the tide and couldn't get off the island, you could call the park service and they would send a boat out to pick you up. Due to rising costs and frequency of visitors the park service will no longer offer this service except in cases of extreme emergency, and has instead contracted with a water-taxi service, whose number is provided on the signs warning visitors not to miss the tide, to come and pick them up. The cost for pickup and delivery back to the park entrance, which is the only place they can safely dock and offload passengers, runs about a hundred and fifty dollars per person. "
*The camera cuts back in to Kaylynn as she stands there near the visible stone and dirt bar that runs across the small islet.*
Kaylynn: "Likewise new no parking signs have gone up on the Bar, indicating that vehicles should not be parked there, but some have taken to ignoring these and park there anyway. The National park service has started issuing fines for illegal dumping of banned materials at sea for vehicles stranded on the bar or that are washed out into the ocean, starting at ten-thousand dollars and not including the cost that the owner of the vehicle must pay to have the vehicle retrieved from the water. This is hopeful to help decrease the amount of cars being parked illegally and as a deterrent to the same. Hopefully this will mean less salvage ships pulling up wrecks from the bottom that can diminish the natural beauty of this island. From Bar Island, this is kaylynn Garcia, who is going to get back to the park before i get stuck over here."
*She winks and grins and the camera cuts back to the news desk once more*
Raymond: “And here I thought taking a cab in Boston required a third mortgage on the house. I wonder when Halo, or the other rideshare companies will start branching out into the water-taxi business.”
Ariana: “That does sound like an interesting thought.” *She smiles and turns to face the side camera as it re-centers on her* “We have a correction for a story we ran previously. Earlier on the news we reported twelve dead members of the Lefty Lane Gang who were found gutted and on display in a residential home over the week. This is inaccurate and is actually two different stories that due to some confusion in research and writing for our show got pressed together. The twelve members of the Lefty Lane were in fact found dead, but local officers claim it looks more like a falling out between members that had them kill each other. The part about gutted and display came from a separate story about a half dozen display homes for a model community that were damaged. A semi-truck driver fell asleep and ended up driving through the homes gutting them in the process. Nobody was hurt since they were model homes for display purposes, but the damage was estimated to be nearly three-quarters of a million dollars. Our Producers advised us of this discrepancy and we apologize for the misleading report.” *She flashes a smile at the camera that does it’s best to look genuine.*
Raymond: “Well sounds like both departments need to get some more coffee in them before they sit down to write and research.” *He adjusts a couple of papers in front of him* “Up next, Several plans for new cellular towers in the bay Area, and how this may affect your service as well as your bill. Also, Spam posters on Chadslist dot com, why are they there, why do they do it and why are they so bad at it. All that, and more, after these commercials.”
*Cuts to Commercials*
*As usual the station tunes into the local Channel 68 news and weather with a slight crackle of static as it fades in on Ariana Bening and Raymond Wages at the main news desk.*
Raymond: “Oh, I hope he keeps his mouth closed and doesn’t swallow any of that…”
Ariana: “Ouch! Well I guess that’s why the city department of utilities advises people not to go freelance exploring in the discovered underground. That rusted metal plank certainly wasn’t up to the task of holding Dean up.”
Raymond: “I’m sure he’ll be fine once he can climb out and they hose him off. Either that or he’ll follow the current to the processing facility and they’ll get him there.” *He adjusts a couple of papers in front of him and turns to a side camera* “In other news, Longtime Northeast Harbor summer resident and former National Security Advisor to President Jimmy Carter, Zbigniew Brzezinski passed away at a hospital in Virginia on May 26. He was 89 years old.”
Ariana: “He was born in Poland, rose to become one of the foremost foreign policy experts in the country. He enjoyed entertaining family and friends at his local summer home, “Tranquility Base.” Brzezinski was a familiar face at local lectures and libraries. His memoir, “Power and Principle,” was published in 1983, and due to donations to the local school system the Bay area middle school has a computer workshop and research station in their library named after him.”
Raymond: “Our condolences go out to his surviving family and friends for their loss. On another note, Wilbert Woods is still out due to pulling a muscle in his back at the Wind surfing competition he was at over the weekend, so here with some brighter news on the weather is Tammi Bean. Tammi?"
*The camera cuts on over to Tammi standing at the Weather station with a big Grin on her face and she waves across the studio to Raymond. *
Tammi: "Thaaaanks Ray!"
*Speaking as if she doesn't have a Mic pinned to her chest and you can just catch sight of Ray wincing as his earpiece picks up her call clearly. Steadying herself with her "Serious" Look aka the Feet planted together arms at her sides and Pouty lips with just the corner of her tongue sticking out the side as she prepares to be all serious about the weather.*
Tammi: "Okay...So all that rain we were having overnight, well that stuffs gonna stick around unfortunately. It makes the thermometer stay with only sixty seven or so little circles all through the day so it's gonna be a day to wear the extra thick bra." *She nods sagely* "Extra padding in front to keep from getting sore. This is going to be how things are for the next couple of days. Lots of Clouds and Some bits of the rain falling keeping those circles in the Low areas. I think on Friday we have thunderstorms and a higher little circle into the Seventy Five area. "
*She presses a button on the remote and an animated weather track shows up indicating that cold front line blowing into the area from the West*
Tammi: "And no wonder...the big blue line is going to come sweeping on through! I mean look at it it's just WHOOSH...Blowing on in....I'll have to take down my laundry so it doesn't get knocked over....I don't have anything that goes with that color...So yes...big blue line due to come in over the end of the week so make sure you bring in anything too tall just in case it flies too low overhead. And I feel sorry for those of you who have tall houses...this thing looks ginormous! Probably take those towers off and OH The Lighthouse...Somebody needs to call the mayor and let him know about this thing!"
*As she babbles the Screen behind her changes to the Weekly rundown indicating most of the days of the week as being cloudy and occasional storms scattered about. Thursday and Friday show Thunderstorms on the Readout....the temperatures lingering between the Mid Fifties and upper Sixties with occasional showings in the low Seventies on those days with the storms as the cold front moves into the area and On through. Winds seem to be in the Mild range with occasional bursts but nothing that Shows a Wind warning. Sunday and Monday of next week seem to clear up and show Sunshine indicators on them as the temperature gets back up into the upper seventies as those days roll around. *
Tammi: 'So make double sure you lock down the windows and pull in those pets and maybe do something to keep it off your roof cause that's a big blue line that's coming right on in. Oh I'm so glad my apartment is on the first floor!" 8She blinks a bit as someone talks to her from the side* "Oh yes...this has been weather, back to you ari...I have to go call the mayor..."
Ariana: “Um…yes…thank you Tammi.”
Tammi: “Wel-Come!” *She can be heard replying before her mic is turned off taking Ari’s thanks at face value*
Raymond: “Well with that it looks like the upcoming Lions Club Bike Rodeo will have a good Saturday for it. We go to Jeannie Webb who is at the site where they are setting up for the various events. Jeannie?”
*The camera cuts to Jeannie wearing elbow pads and holding a bike helmet standing next to an open space with several BMX types practicing tricks and bouncing on their front or rear tires in the background*
Jeannie: “Thanks Raymond, this Saturday the Bay area Lions club and local police departments are gearing up for the annual Bike Rodeo. Such events as the slow race, the wheelie competition, the bunny hop and many more.”
*The camera shows video from last year’s event with Jeannie trying to keep from putting her foot down or falling over in the “Slow race” and a video of her pulling up for a wheelie in the “longest wheelie” competition only to have her lose control, the bike slip out from under her and as she lets go of the handlebars the bike goes crashing into Dean who was on the sidelines as Jeannie talks in voiceover*
Jeannie: ~Voiceover~ “The annual event takes place this Saturday at the bay area Public festival grounds from Ten AM to Five PM, The last time to sign up for events is half an hour before they begin. There are classes on bicycle safety, rules of the road, upkeep and how to check for wear and tear, and more. Also the local PTA group intends on having their cookout pot-luck in the park at the same time so there’ll be food and festivities a plenty!”
*The camera cuts back to her directly*
Jeannie: “Also this year several of the BMX Stunt Troupe have come down to put on several shows of skill and display numerous tricks. As always they talk with the kids about how it takes years of practice to get this good to try and head off any bad accidents. Everyone should come on down and enjoy the festivities! From the public festival grounds, I’m Jeannie Webb.”
*The camera cuts back to Raymond at the news desk*
Raymond: “Sounds like it’s going to be a fun time. After the break, parking uptown this summer you may feel like you are being watched. How parking enforcement is setting up stakeouts to make sure time limits are strictly enforced. Six casks of imported liquor went missing from the docks, we'll have the story on where they ended up. all that and more after the break."
*Cut to commercials*
*As it’s time for local news and weather, the familiar crackle of static as AP Local CH 68 is summoned forth from the Television Ether can be heard. The picture forms up on the familiar round-table set of the Point, Counter-Point program. The news team’s own Dean Knopinski speaking.*
Dean: “Well Marc, I have to both agree and disagree with you on the subject. I agree that there’s no such thing as an impartial journalist…” *The host of the show can be seen grinning and about to cut in. “…but that doesn’t mean that there can’t be impartial and unbiased reporting.”
*Marc Langler and several others at the table all seem to start speaking at once while Dean just holds up his hand to ask for them to calm down*
Dean: “If you will allow me to explain…” *The camera focuses entirely on Dean, showing at the bottom: “Dean Knopinski, BA Journalism, Emerson College”*
Marc Langler: "Well I certainly hope you would."
Dean: *He smiles and steeples his fingers over his coffee mug on the table* "All journalists are human beings, therefore will form an opinion and thus be biased in any regard to a story. With some of the stories we cover it's impossible to avoid bias, unless someone is a complete sociopath. But they don't have to let that opinion show in their reporting. The same way that someone puts on a fake smile and asks you if they can help you find anything when you go shopping, while inwardly they just want you to leave them alone or go kill yourself." *That illicits a chuckle around the guests at the table as Dean picks up the coffee mug and takes a sip of what's inside*
Dean: "When I was still in school, in one of the writing classes the professor gave us an assignment. Write a persuasive piece about whether it's better for someone to go out and invest time and money into their community, or if they should spend that on themselves. fairly simple assignment, and you know everyone is going to write on what we've been taught where improving everyone in the community's standards makes you a good neighbor and makes things better for everyone, yourself included, yada yadda yadda.."
*The camera cuts to show several of the other panelists nodding in agreement or smiling lightly, most of them probably have similar memories of writing assignments*
Dean: "Well I was doing well in the class and, to be fair, feeling a little snarkey about a review of another paper I did for him, so instead of taking that side of the subject, I picked the opposite side. " *One of the Guests holds her hand up over her mouth like that's some kind of shameful thing while another chuckles at his audacity.* "Well as you can imagine, after we handed them in I was dreading getting called out on it, so when he asked to see me after class and I saw my paper sitting there on his desk I was feeling a little torpedoed. Then I thought, well heck it's a persuasive paper and meets all his criteria, if he didn't like it he had best be ready for an argument."
*Another bout of Chuckles and laughter as Dean squares off his jaw and holds up a fist in a mock threatening way.*
Dean: "Well he didn't seem angry or even ask me what I thought he would. he simply put his hand on my paper and asked me: 'Do you really believe this?' Which kind of threw me because well I hadn't...and I said that no, I didn't actually believe that was the best way. he nodded and asked me then: 'Well then why did you write it?' still being kind of snarky and headstrong at the time I shrugged and told him that I wrote it to see if I could, which wasn't completely false, I had mostly written it to see if I could get away with it. he nodded and told me I was the only one who got full marks on the paper because by the end I had nearly convinced him to change his stance on the issue."
*There's some gasps and one of the other guests claps lightly at the story*
Dean: "You may have a bias, That's only being human, but that doesn't mean you have to let it influence what you write or report. "
Marc: "Interesting, but what do you attribute the whole wave of biased media that we are seeing now where some of us see the source as being Fast News or other sites and won't even read the topic knowing it's going to be horribly skewed away from what the truth is."
Dean: "Well first I think you can learn a lot from reading or watching the proponents of both sides of any issue, if only so you know where your crazy uncle is coming from at the family get together when he rants about something. But this is where competition begins to backfire and capitalism corporate competition fails the journalism industry. the thought is the more competition the better or cheaper a product you have to produce to keep competitive with your rivals. it fails when there's too much competition and the product you are selling is information. Back when things started out there were what..Four channels, three of which had evening news? Sometimes you could switch from one channel to another and they'd be covering the same story and finishing each other sentences nearly. All of a sudden we have thousands of channels a lot of which claim to offer news, competition increases, heck I think I even saw a Mtv news channel the other day, not sure what they report on but I imagine it's not Music..."
*Another round of Chuckles and laughter at the joke as Dean takes a sip and proceeds.*
Dean: "That's where marketing needs to be able to sell advertising space to targeted demographics for commercials and make money to keep the channel running. And thus are reporters convinced to report news from a biased stance to engage those viewers that marketing wants to sell products to. See Humans are hard wired to learn from others. You put somebody down with fifty articles from various sources to read, they may maintain the information they read over there, but if you ask them later on where they heard that information from, the couldn't tell you. but if they watch Myself or this show or another news program they'll be able to say: 'Oh yes Dean was saying something about that the other day.' or 'I saw a special that Benita did on SAP about that'. The put a face with the information because a news program engages them on a person to person basis. And thus you want the person teaching you or giving you information to be saying things you want to hear. So long as marketing needs to boost revenue sales, news programs are going to continue to become more biased to lock down those viewership numbers, to continue prostituting themselves to the public. It's a fairly vicious cycle where you need the money to continue broadcasting, but you have to keep being entertaining and engaging a specific market segment to get that money, and if you start pandering too much is what you are broadcasting true, or is it as bad as reality television."
*The camera centers on the familiar duo of Ariana Bening and Raymond Wages in the CH 68 News room, looking at the camera.*
Ariana: That was our own Dean Knopinski appearing on the most recent Point, Counter-Point round table. The topic was: 'bias in the media.' We obtained special permission to rebroadcast it.”
Raymond: “Interesting stuff, I didn’t know he attended Emerson College.”
Ariana: “I did.”
*Raymond quirks a brow at her but smiles and lets it go at that, though he does flinch a bit as if she kicked him under the table.*
Raymond: “During the filming of that episode, it seems one of the other guests became annoyed at something the host, Marc Langler, said during a break and threw her coffee mug at the man. She missed and hit one of the mic operators who unfortunately lost control of the boom microphone which swung around and knocked Dean off the stage into the food service table. We have no footage of the unfortunate happening, but are told that the doctors do not believe he has a concussion and are keeping him in the hospital overnight for observation. He’s expected to be fine and return to work later this week.”
Ariana: “That’s great news! Get well soon Dean we miss you!”
*She adjusts her papers and puts the “television smile” away as she turns to face the second camera as it switches to her*
Ariana: “After numerous heated arguments on both sides, the local municipality of Trenton has decided that residents will still have to apply for permits when they wish to hold a yard or garage sale. Voters and the board of selectmen both turned down two amendment articles that would exempt Yard and Garage sales from having to file the paperwork for permits on Friday and Tuesday respectively. The results of the votes were just made public this morning.”
Raymond: “Looks like a lot more Trenton residents will be powering up the old Craigsstuff and eBuy websites to save on the hassle. Now to give us an idea on what the weather would be like for such yard sales, lets go to Wilbert Woods at weather central sixty eight. How’s mother nature looking out there this week Wil?”
*The camera cuts over to Wilbert Woods at the Weather Central desk, the screen behind him showing scattered rain on the area*
Wilbert: "Well There's some good news, today we start off with some scattered showers here and there, not so good for a yard sale anyway, but all these storm clouds blow out by the late afternoon and evening and clear up giving us a high in the upper seventies, dropping down to sixty one overnight as the ocean winds blow in. Tomorrow, sunny with scattered clouds, Low eighties as the temperature lingers in that nice area. Winds picking up as the day progresses but nothing too harsh, a Good day to take out the sailboat if you have the chance. "
*he changes the screen to a day by day forecast display. Instead of the usual backdrop of blue is a beach scene with Wilbert wearing a rather skimpy European style swimsuit with his Rear end just barely covered by "Saturday" on the display. Might have been taken from his vacation photos*
Wilbert: "Thursday night the winds die down and we remain in the upper sixties for temperature, leading into bright sunny day on Friday, With the high maybe in the low Nineties, those winds overnight will blow in a couple of scattered storms that won't linger too long on Saturday morning and clear out for another Sunny day. The temperature will cool a bit into the mid Eighties. Overnight Saturday the clouds roll back in, but no storms are expected. Making Sunday a cloudy day with intermittent sunshine and high humidity keeping the temperature in the high eighties, but with other factors it'll feel like it's in the mid nineties by evening. Then on Monday the rain rolls back in in the afternoon lingering from late afternoon and overnight. Temperatures dropping back to the low Eighties and upper seventies during the day with nighttime dropping back to the sixties. Tuesday expect more of the same, scattered storms, a couple may be thunderstorms, with the temperature lingering in the upper sixties, dropping down to fifty nine or so overnight as the wind and rain chill things down considerably."
*The background display shows Wilbert's face overlaid on the "singing in the rain" scene with bad photoshopping indicating it's done because he sounds so happy for rain*
Wilbert: "So a nice pleasant weekend and back to some stormy cooler weather the beginning of June. But about normal for this time of year. "
*The camera cuts back over to Ariana and Raymond*
Ariana: "Looks like it's going to be a great weekend to get out of the house and take in some events and sunshine. Thanks Wil."
*The camera centers on Raymond as he makes an adjustment in his seat to face front*
Raymond: "A undisclosed man was arrested yesterday after trying to shoplift a bottle of bourbon whiskey from the marketplace general store. The police arrived on the scene as the employee on site tried to stop the man from leaving the premises. Witnesses state that the man saw the officers arrive on scene and proceeded to open the bottle and try to guzzle the entire contents down before they could arrest him. He was taken to the local hospital to be treated for potential alcohol poisoning. His name has not yet been released by authorities. "
Ariana: "Lightweight.." *She blinks realizing she said that out loud and Chuckles as she looks at the camera* "Liquor thefts are not something another Bay area establishment has to worry about, we go now to Jeannie Webb on site at Big D's Sports bar and grill. Jeannie?"
*The camera cuts to Jeannie Webb standing outside the familiar little hole in the wall style bar. A modest exterior with just a sign out front that says "Big D's" and the entire facility seems to have been a converted shop that probably sold shoes or fishing tackle at one point*
Jeannie: "Hiii Everyone and Thanks Ari. Big D's back here recently had some trouble when local residents complained about the sheer amount of nosie from the Bar, especially during open mic night and when they had live bands perform. Big D's operates such with a special amusement permit issued by the town council which was coming up for renewal. The council did approve the permit, but attached a rider to receive monthly reports from the police about noise complaints."
*The camera cuts to a man speaking into the mic as Jeannie interviewed him earlier*
Man: "Weekends isn't so bad, but they have open mic night on Tuesdays and sometimes live bands playing on Wednesdays. Tenants and tourists who rent out the apartments I have next door complain about the noise all the time. I had to rent out my normal apartment to keep the money coming in and move into the closest unit. it gets real bad sometimes on open mic night especially. I called the cops lots of times, but well nothing ever happens."
*The camera cuts back to Jeannie out front of the bar*
Jeannie: "Big D's owner claims he had no idea that those buildings were used for rentals and tourist apartments, the district is mostly one with other businesses. He went on to explain that he's invested in new air conditioning and encourages his employees to keep the door and windows shut on weekday nights. Claiming that at Ten O clock on weeknights the mic and sound system for live performances is turned off and claims that he has done all he can to try and minimize disturbances. Councilors seem convinced he has been doing so which is why they renewed the permit. But also added the rider and requested that local police do more proactive patrols in the area near the time for quieting down. Only time will tell if this is considered enough. Live from big D's, I'm Jeannie Webb."
*The camera cuts back to the news desk*
Raymond: "For those interested our own recent trip to open Mic night at the bar is available on the website, including our own Tammi Bean singing 'Girls just want to have fun' and Ariana doing a magnificent rendition of 'I will survive'."
Ariana: "Speaking of bartenders and waitresses, Kaylynn Garcia has been following a shift in the minimum wage referendums moving through the state. Kaylynn?"
*The camera cuts to Kaylynn Garcia sitting at the side desk (or kids table) for in house reporting when they aren't in the field. She adjusts some of her papers and flashes a grin*
Kaylynn: "In the past year a great deal has gone towards adjusting the minimum wage for workers in the state. the latest referendum concerns those who earn tips as part of their wages. Last month a 'tip credit' was passed by committee and goes to the state senate for consideration. Under current Maine law, restaurant servers and other tipped workers earning a minimum of five dollars per hour are scheduled to receive a one-dollar per hour raise every year until their current sub-minimum wage reaches the regular minimum wage. The downside to this is that it may cause people who own restaurants and other service industries to charge more and patrons to tip less, which means a whole difference in encouragement for good service provided."
*She adjusts her papers and several graphs show in the background showing wages and increases and comparing prices and all kinds of graphic data to back up both sides*
Kaylynn: "The proposal is about instituting a Tip credit wherein an employer can consider tips earned by their workers as meeting part of the employers obligation to pay the standard minimum wage of nine dollars per hour. The current language precludes such and demands the yearly raise till base pay meets minimum. by instituting this credit it takes out the yearly demand and it's hopeful that in the long run without a demanded increase that the workers will still be making the goal of the standardized minimum wage. Detractors also state, that this does cause some headaches for business owners who would have to calculate all reported tips and reconcile that with the hourly wage on a weekly basis to ensure they meet standards. The bill still needs to pass through the senate and be signed into law by the Governor, but many are confident that it'll be instituted in twenty-eighteen."
*The camera cuts back to Ariana and Raymond in the news room.*
Ariana: “Thank you Kaylynn, it’ll be interesting to see just how far this proposal goes, and how it’ll affect the next bout of pitchers someone gets when they are out celebrating their birthday.”
Raymond: “Coming up after the break, more on the fight for who pays what percentage of the Bay area school budget from their taxes, Kyler, our intern, has a story on that bitter fight between townships. Also, could it start costing more for locals to start parking downtown? Several proposals about parking enforcement are upcoming for the board of selectmen. The Eastern Maine skippers program will kick off the summer this weekend, find out where and what activities they have planned. And finally, the New England Fishery Management Council is hosting public hearings on numerous proposals at its next meeting, find out what they are and how you can get involved. All this and more after these commercials.”
*Cut to Commercials*
*The familiar static crackle of the channel switching over to AP local 68 once again solidifies into the familiar faces of Ariana Bening and Raymond Wages at the news desk. Both today for some reason wearing the exact same sports coat, though Ariana seems to be wearing a low cut blouse underneath while Raymond has his dark blue power tie.*
Raymond: “…at this time the initial appearance of the gentleman has sparked some debate as he has entered a plea of ‘Not guilty’ to all charges of possession of sexually explicit material of a minor. The man is being held without bail, local officers at the township say that is due to several threats made against his life by concerned citizens. The trial is scheduled to begin this July.”
Ariana: *Shakes her head and frowns* “And we will have more on the aspects of this case from our…legal consultant Mary-Ann Ratering later on in the hour. But for some other news concerning minors we go to Jeannie Webb at the Bay Area Public School District. Jeannie?”
*The camera cuts to Jeannie Webb standing in the lobby of the District Administrative offices of the Bay Area Public Schools. Behind her somewhat camped out or standing in line or milling about are numerous adults. Some chatting, some just standing there checking the time.*
Jeannie: “thank you Ari, As you can see there’s a crowd already gathering for today’s School board session. Today is the first open session since the budget for the district was submitted for approval, which means that today and most of the sessions in the upcoming weeks will revolve around determining what percentage of this budget will be paid by individual townships in the district.”
*Jeannie turns and motions to the crowd, some of whom wave back, some ignore her and others make faces and ham it up a bit for the news, before overlaid on the screen is a map of the school district.*
Jeannie: *Voiceover* “The people here are representatives of various townships in the Bay Area who are looking to provide their input on just which townships should pay which percentage. As you know all the individual townships in the district send public students to the same schools rather than having individual schools for each, what the district now needs to decide is how much of the money requested in the budget submission will come from each district.” *As she speaks the various townships highlighted on the map show several lines and pie chart percentages which have been previous years data. The Camera then returns directly to Jeannie.*
Jeannie: “The main issue that usually comes up is percentages of the cost being funded from wealthier communities against those who have more children of school age. Not to mention transportation costs for both busing and ferry passes. Sometimes the debate meetings can last all day and well into the evening as various community representatives state their cases and counter-arguments as to why they should pay a different amount. Considering just the High School is slated for a Two point Eight Eight Million budget for the upcoming year, it’s almost guaranteed to be a bit of a tooth and nail fight. From the bay Area School District, I’m Jeannie Webb”
*The camera cuts back to Ariana and Raymond at the news desk*
Raymond: “Thank you Jeannie. Sounds like it’s going to get pretty heated over there. “
Ariana: “Parents and money usually ends up that way Raymond.” *She turns to face the side camera as it cues up on her* “Speaking of things getting heated, Wilbert Woods has what you can expect from Mother Nature this week. Wil?”
*The camera cuts to Wilbert Woods standing in front of the radar tracking screen. As he stands there a plastic (obviously) dinosaur wiggle-moves it's way onto the screen behind him and then looks like it's trying to beat him with it's open mouth. Little word bubbles appear above it's head going "RAWR" And "OM NOM!" Till Wil starts moving and the Dino disappears.*
Wilbert: "Thank you Ari. Wel have a remarkably beautiful weekend ahead of us. Today, sunny clear skies with highs in the near eighties. Dropping down to the mid Sixties tonight. Tomorrow, more of the same..." *As he says this the image behind him shows a "chibi" Anime version of Wilbert in a Speedo standing on a beach flashing the Peace sign.* "...Temperatures reaching low Eighties in the afternoon and dropping back to high sixties overnight. Sunday night this storm front moves in and clouds thicken up, making Monday start out overcast with little sun, that keeps the temperature fairly steady in the low Seventies till the afternoon storms arrive and it drops to the upper sixties. Overnight it'll drop into the low sixties as rainstorms continue."
*He indicates the front of rainstorms moving through on the projection map. The front "grows" a pair of googly eyes and a word balloon stating: 'Don't touch me there!' As Wil motions to various parts of the front*
Wilbert: "Tuesday we have cloudiness with continued showers, this cold front pushing the rain into the area starts to move in and our temperatures drop into the low sixties to upper fifties for the morning and evening. Showers mostly drift on out as the cold weather hits, with a few lingering and scattered over the area going into Tuesday night. Wednesday we continue with intermittent showers starting out the morning, becoming a steady rain storm later on in the afternoon. The high only being about Sixty three as that cold wind keeps moving through the area. Wednesday night and Thursday look about the same with intermittent rain storms lingering here and there and popping up all across the map as temperatures linger in the cold range."
*The weather map behind Wilbert shows a half-dozen cartoon images of generic people wearing bathing suits with icicles hanging off various body parts and teeth chattering*
Wilbert: "Friday is still overcast in the morning with light rain showers here and there, remaining cloudy but the ran letting up in the evening, the temperature sticking in the middle sixties as the cold front moves onward out of the area. Saturday the clouds keep lingering heavily overhead, but this does push the temperature back up into the low seventies as they slowly decrease going into the evening, So Sunday the Twenty-eighth as this cold push is out of the area we are back to partly cloudy skies and Upper Seventies for the temperature. "
*The camera cuts back to Raymond and Ariana at the news desk*
Ariana: "Ugh, looks like a final push of cold air from our lovely Canadian neighbors."
Raymond: "Looks like we should have had them build that giant Space Heater huh?"
*They both laugh a bit remembering the story from a while ago about the giant Space heater to stop Canada from sending their cold fronts.*
Raymond: "Well tourist season is upon us, and once again local municipalities are looking for a way to cash in on the boom in transient travelers by way of taxes. That's right once more a seasonal local tax option is being considered by numerous townships around the bay area and state itself. Currently there is local tax on restaurants and lodging and other generally considered tourist fares, this option would adjust the tax rate for such during those peak activity months if enacted by the local municipality. Some would begin in March and go till September, others would start in April and go till October, it all depends on the local ordinance and would cover such things as Hotel lodging, car rental, Boat rental, Eating in a restaurant, getting take out or Delivery of food and grocery services."
Ariana: "Currently the adjustment rate is legally not allowed to exceed two percent during the busy season and proponents say that with all the extra traffic and tourists flocking to the area it would be a real boost to offset the costs of upkeep and utility usage. As you recall we already covered the water and sewer companies seeking a proposal for a seasonal hike in costs during the peak months earlier in the month. Detractors state that this tax only benefits industries and areas with more specialized hotel and restaurant facilities and doesn't really assist communities with national parks and open beaches nearly as much which also see a high rise in wear and tear of facilities due to increased tourist traffic. Also hotels and restaurant owners state that such an adjustment causes problems for book keeping and changes in the way they handle their accounts to make certain that the proper amount is paid from the month under such a seasonal tax to a month not."
Raymond: "Another group who is opposed to this are the so called 'Snow birds' or persons who spend the warmer months residing locally, and travel to southern climates during the winter. Claiming that they are local residents, but that utility hikes and raised local taxes during their time here is unfair. The proposal goes to the state next month, and if enacted could show up on the local ballots for enactment this summer and take effect as early as March twenty eighteen. As usual if you have some insight or opinion to share on this there is a link on our website to Bay Area community speaks forums where you can provide your opinion and read what others are saying about important legislation. Also restaurant and shop reviews, upcoming events and even a garage sale section where you can buy and sell items with other locals. "
Ariana: "On the subject of tourism, there's a new term being spread around. Glamping. Now I know what you think, it sounds like some new kind of thing local youth are getting into you have to listen and intervene in."
Raymond: "In fact when the erm came up at the News topic meeting our producers made it very clear that we were not sending Dean under-cover into the Red Light District again..."
*Both he and Ariana can't help but grin and chuckle a bit at that remembered debacle*
Ariana: "But a Internet search and some discussion later the issue was cleared up and Kaylynn Garcia has that story on just what Glamping is and how it's coming to Maine this summer. Kaylynn?"
*The screen cuts to Kaylynn Garcia sitting on a large 4 poster bed in what looks like a fairly nice furnished cabin*
Kaylynn: "Summer is a time for camping, fires, marshmallows, sleeping bags and tents. Roughing it out in the middle of the woods or beach, or even trekking out to the middle of nowhere with your recreational vehicle, not so much with delivered fresh lobster and seven-hundred thread count Egyptian cotton sheets."
*She stands up and walks across the floor and pushes on the "wall" to open the flap on a...tent!?!? and steps out in front*
Kaylynn: "Glamping, or 'glamorous camping' is coming to Maine this summer. Sandy pines, Willow Brook and Bear-trails campgrounds will be furnishing between fifteen and a hundred of these glam tents on their facilities this summer for nightly or weekend rentals. All are professionally decorated, and feature amenities such as room service, electricity, some will even have local cable channels on high def televisions and improved wifi access."
*She walks down along the rows of large spacious tents spread around, several with various designs indicating a difference*
Kaylynn: "All the tents have themes, Arabian nights, Nomads, Nautical journey and so on. Also included are mini fridges, fans, some even have rear decks with grills and five or seven of them in a pod will share a communal bathouse with hot water and internal plumbing facilities, including a steam room. The tents themselves have been equated to being in a luxury hotel room, only inside a tent. As a bonus for June renters at the start of the season fresh Lobster can be delivered either cooked or live for your own cooking as part of the menu. The owners of the campground say that this program may continue if there's enough interest in having it on the menu."
*She reaches a central area with a large firepit and numerous benches stools and tables all around arranged like a old theater area*
Kaylynn: "The rentals start at around one fifty a night on up to two ten depending on the date and availability, they suggest you check out the camping site website for booking arrangements. and for those who still want to do things the old fashoned way, there are still hundreds of primitive and RV sites still at the individual campgrounds. Though for some the expanded wifi is well worth the additional luxury. This has been Kaylynn Garcia for Glamping."
*The camera cuts back to Raymond and Ariana in the news room*
Raymond: "Hrm, interesting. From what I understand the Glamping trend started in Europe and has recently made it's way over to the US in the past year or so. Also we'd like to remind our viewers that although Glamping may sound amazing, these are still primitive campsites and thus don't have safety or other standards set by building inspectors or the like the same way you would at a actual hotel facility. You are effectively renting someone else's tent and sleeping in it, so keep that in mind before you book."
Ariana: "Good thing you bring that up ray, as another facility is having health and safety problems of it's own going into the busy season. For that story we go to Dean Knopinski at Seal Cove Rustic Cabins. Dean?"
*The camera cuts to Dean standing amid what looks like several dozen log cabins that have been demolished, though on closer inspection it's obvious they are still in the construction phase. and haven't finished being assembled*
Dean: "Thank you Ari, the owners of Seal cove Rustic Cabins who were looking to expand their facilities this spring by erecting nearly fifty new single cabins and thirty doubles have run into a bit of a hiccup as the permits they had for the old buildings didn't cover the new, and the land they purchased to expand on was in violation of local zoning ordinance for such facilities. Enforcement officers arrived today to issue a cease and desist order for the construction crews. This spells some bad news as it may close the entire facility for most of the summer and the owners are already ~BLEEEP!!~"
*He exclaims as one of the state police officers comes rushing by on a four-wheeler. causing Dean to step off the dirt path, and trip over something. Stumbling a couple of feet to fall head-first into a large concrete foundation still being poured. landing in the liquid concrete and splashing around like some kind of swamp thing rising up from the murky depths flailing about covered head to toe in the gray fake stone as the camera cuts back to the news desk.*
Raymond: “I’m sure he’s okay.” *He adjusts some papers and turns back to the main camera* “After the break, bridges and ramps for the main byways, which are being delayed on repair and construction and how will this affect your commute? Communities all around the bay area have allocated funds and accepted bids for landscaping, what this means for your taxes and neighborhood. A table saw was reported stolen Friday, where police say it ended up and why.”
Ariana: “All those stories and more after these commercials.”
~Cut to Commercials~
*The familiar buzz of static as local AP Ch 68 cues up for news and weather. The first image is of a car with its front end wrapped around a light post with the rear end smashed up fairly badly as well. Another car with it’s front end torn up sitting off to the side as several flashing lights of Sheriff and emergency crews are on scene. The familiar voice of Raymond Wages speaking over the image.*
Raymond: *Voiceover* “…Seen here where the cars came to rest, the driver of the first vehicle had his wheels turned to make a right at the intersection which is how his car was pushed into the lamp post.”
*The camera cuts back to the news room showing Raymond and Ariana Bening at the news desk.*
Ariana: “The woman driving the car that struck him has not yet been identified by the authorities, however the first driver has stated that he had stopped to let a pedestrian cross when the second car suddenly rear-ended him and sent them both around the corner. Authorities stated that thankfully the pedestrian was missed by the vehicles and was unharmed, There is no stop sign or signal at this intersection, and both drivers are being taken to the hospital for examination. It’s also unknown if drugs or alcohol were involved in this collision.”
Raymond: “And a happy Mother’s day to all those out there who have been called mom.” *The screen behind him shows several pictures in sequence of himself and an older woman who has to be his mother as he gives her a edible arrangement basket, a image of Ariana laying side by side with a similar looking woman with mud mask facials and towels at a spa, Jeannie Webb and another older woman playing what looks like beach Volleyball. * “Just a reminder that though you may appreciate all they did and all they do every day, today is the one to let her know you appreciate it, or at least finally clean all your old things out of her Garage like she’s been asking you to.”
Ariana: *laughs softly and adjusts some papers in front of her* “And it’s not only human mothers who get special notice today. Some other mothers are getting their pups off to a good start, Kaylynn Garcia has that story. Kaylynn?”
*The camera cuts to the Field reporter standing on a sandy beach with the morning sunlight making the sand and waves sparkle. In the background several dozen baby seal pups can be seen laying on the sand…digging in it with their noses and front flippers. Several are chasing each other in the splashing waves and seeming to play tag, with the water or each other who knows. One rather fat looking one is laying on its back splayed out seeming to take in the sunlight.”
Kaylynn: “Thank you Ari. As you can see harbor seal pup season has started, which means all the young pups are learning how to swim and catch fish from their mothers. From May to Early July these pups will be a sight on the beaches as their mothers are out foraging for food. The harbor authority has asked us to remind our viewers that it’s best not to approach the pups. You may find them by themselves, or in small groups, and may be tempted to try and help them, but this is not a good idea.”
*The camera shows several close ups of baby harbor seals playing or laying or nudging at the camera with a “nose front’ view*
Kaylynn: *Voiceover* “They look adorable and your heart may be dying to hear them cry and carry on, but like many aquatic mammals, harbor seals are not in distress, they need to spend some time out of the water resting. The pup may approach you, snuggle up and may even try sucking on your shoe, this is normal behavior and doesn’t mean they have been abandoned or need assistance. Mother harbor seals go out foraging for food and return to the beach they left their baby at to feed it through the day, meanwhile like all babies the pup is developing its muscles and getting a healthy layer of insulating fat.”
*The camera comes back to Kaylynn standing on the Boardwalk with the pups in the background*
Kaylynn: “It’s best to leave the pups alone so as not to scare off the mother. There are rare cases where the pups are actually abandoned by an ill or injured mother, or she dies while out foraging. In this case fish and wildlife wardens are trained to assist and help the pup. If you think a Pup has been abandoned you can call the number below, or on our website, and contact a member who can come out and assess the situation. Do not approach, touch or try and put the pup back in the ocean, like many babies they need rest and if they are on land, they are most likely resting. Do not pour water on the pup or feed it, at this young age the pup is still developing it’s insulating under layer and may not be able to handle cold seawater or digest anything other than milk. And amazingly enough Seals are lactose intolerant so giving them cow’s milk as a surrogate mother may just make them sick!”
*The camera splits to show the newsroom again with Kaylynn on the other side*
Ariana: “Lots of good information, and Oh they look so adorable!”
Kaylynn: “I know I just want to go play with them, but it is illegal to touch harass or harm any marine mammal in the United states, so I guess I’ll just have to watch from back here. This has been Kaylynn Garcia beachfront.” *The camera cuts from split screen back to the news desk*
Raymond: “Thank you Kaylynn. Now as we all know a lot of people make elaborate plans and try and surprise their mothers with a surprise brunch or picnic or other gathering. To tell us what the weather has in store for today and the next couple of days, here’s Tammi Bean standing in for Wilbert Woods. Tammi?”
*The camera cuts over to the perky blond wearing what looks like an overly long sweater that goes down to above her knees. As the camera cues up she blinks surprised and then smiles big*
Tammi: “HiiiIIIII! Everybody!” *waving excitedly at her own reflection in the camera lens* “As you can tell it’s one of my favoritist times of the Whole year!” 8She speaks with just a tint of Awe to her voice like it’s some big revelation* “And that time, as you may recall is….” *She fumbles a bit…the microphone making some scruffing noises as she starts yanking the sweater-dress up over her head and holds it up triumphantly revealing the silver and black Bikini underneath* “….BIKINI TIME!”
*On the screen behind her the words “BIKINI TIME” in big swollen balloon lettering bounces around like it’s dancing as she twirls the dress overhead before throwing it off screen.*
Tammi: “That’s right, time to pack up all those nasty itchy thick winter cold weather things and break out the Bikini! Now I know what you are wondering…You are wondering ‘Well Tammi…what kind of Bikini is right for me? Stripes? Polka-dots?’ Well never fear, Here’s my suggestions! Polka dots are okay, but if you have a light suit and dark dots you may get some strange looks till they get in close enough to see you actually don’t have like six…” *She motions to her own substantial chest obviously meaning nipples* “I tend to like a good set of contrasting stripes or a solid color just to avoid the problem. As for thickness….” *She pauses as someone speaks to her from off camera*
Tammi: “OoooOOOOOh…right I’m supposed to be telling you what days are best for wearing the bikini rather than what one to wear.” *She giggles* “Silly Tammi…” *She licks her lips and puts on her “Serious face” putting her hands together in front of her like how Wilbert tends to do to start off his weather report, which does nothing to keep her chest from pressing together and sticking out. as the daily weather-track images pop up on the screen behind her*
Tammi: Oooh somebody got all the moms a nice week ahead. lots of poofy clouds and sunbeams, and all kinds of little circles! Starting out today it looks like lots of poofy clouds with Sixty seven little circle, but after night time it looks like it drops down to fifty nine little circles with some icky rain. But that's okay cause who wears their bikini on the beach at night right?" 8She giggles as the weather track moves on*
Tammi: "Tomorrow, more clouds and poofiness, and some scattered showers." *She looks confused for a minute* "Aren't showers taken in the bathroom? Oh wait they have showers at the Gym...and the beach and the spa...okay that makes sense then. But the big thing is we get up to seventy-three little circles despite all the showers, and overnight the temperature holds onto sixty seven little circles and no rain just moonbeams.
Tammi: "The bestist part of the week is after Tuesday tho, when it's all sunbeams and small clouds with the little circles staying between sixty five at night and Seventy nine during the daytime! " *She points and motions to the parts on the map all excitedly making everything jiggle for the camera* "So those are the days to go and use your bikini knowledge at the beach!" *She puts on one of those stern "pout" faces as she holds up a finger* "And don't forget to use good Sunscreen, see you at the beach!"
*Another giggle and she blows a kiss to the camera as it cuts back over to Raymond and Ariana sitting at the news desk, both not entirely certain what just happened. Ariana regains her composure first and clears her throat*
Ariana: "Ah...yes...Thanks...Tammi, as always that was....enjoyable." *She obviously kicks Raymond under the table when he Snickers a bit at Ariana's Dry tone and something off camera. Most likely Tammi taking Ari's comment at face value and being perky and cheerful even more*
Raymond: *Grunts as he's kicked* "The sailing club, who call themselves the Wharf Rats, from the local High School competed in the Marblehead open and according to Jeannie Webb, they are bringing back some big news. Jeannie?"
*The Camera cuts to Jeannie standing on the dockside with all manner of sailboats being tied up and packed up or unloaded, behind her sitting on the side of a local School bus are several dozen boys and girls half hanging out the windows hooting and hollering holding up a trophy*
Jeannie: "That's right Ray, as you can see behind me the Wharf Rats took Second place in the overall timed trials, but claimed First boat across the line, and even extra points for having no boats fail the courses. Which meant they tied for first place in invitational!" *She turns at the announcement to Fist-pump at the kids who break into new hoots and hollers and cheers* "This means this team beat out the Marblehead High Founders, the Richard Stevens Academy Privateers, the Roger Williams High Skipping Clams and the Hampton Falls Broadsiders. They tied in points with the Tabor Academy Irregulars and for the next year the title will be held by both schools. No Bay area sailing team has taken First place since the first invitational forty years ago. WHARF RATS!" *She cheers and most of the kids behind her stick their noses up and paw at the air like rats clawing at something as the camera cuts back to the news desk*
Raymond: "Certainly cause for Celebration. Closer to home, after the recent inclimate weather and people buying new replacement or first time emergency equipment, Dean Knopinski has been following a story currently on the State Legislature about disposal about something really important."
*The camera shows several bouts of archived footage of ships and boathouses and even a couple of cars burning uncontrollably with Dean Speaking in voice-over*
Dean: *Voice-over* "If you are out on a boat, or lost in the woods, or end up with a flat tire and need to make sure people can find you or notice you, flares and other such devices can be a lifesaver. however many times people don't check the expiration dates, test them to make sure they still work, or dispose of them properly and merely stick them away somewhere, and the results, can be devastating."
*The camera Cuts now to Dean himself standing along side the Coast Guard pier holding his microphone*
Dean: "Even here at the local coast guard office, there's no state mandated location or procedure for disposal of flares." *He holds out the mic to one of the officers who smiles and then shrugs*
CG Officer: "That's right, for ourselves and several other guard offices around the coast we take the ones that are near expiring or are the oldest when we get new supplies and take them out during the daylight hours and set them up to burn and detonate on a barge that we are retiring to help build man-made reefs out in the gulf. Elsewhere, they'd have set procedures from the state or county on disposal, Which is why we can currently get away with that kind of controlled explosion disposal, but it does mean we can't accept old supplies from private or commercial ships who need to get rid of their own supplies."
Dean: "The Criminal Justice and Public Safety committees for the Maine Legislature are currently going over proposals to submit for full referendum that would put proper disposal programs in pla...." *He's cut off as suddenly what looks like a Takeout coffee Hits him square in the face and Bursts soaking him in the brew as somebody off mic can be heard Screeching. Coming into view wielding her oversized purse like a battle-axe or morning star beating Dean about the head shoulders and anywhere she can get a target on is a lady who has to be in her mid Sixties or so, silvery-white hair intermixed with the Dark, like any number of older ladies you see anywhere.*
Mrs. Knopinski: "You ~BLEEP BLEEP~ Son of a ~BLEEP BLEEEP BLEEEEEEP~ FLARE DISPOSAL! Your Sister Sent me A Card and Your Brother Had the Decency to Call but All I get from you is a ~BLEEEP BLEEEEEEP~ Text ~BLEEP~ Message and not even a 'Hi Ma' For the Camera! You UNGRATEFUL!" *She continues going through her tirade while beating upon Dean more and more. *
Dean: "Ma...No...I...Ow! Could You...OW....OW....Take the Rocks out of the Bag First Ma...OW!"
*The camera cuts away from the scene back to the news desk where Ariana is giggling and Raymond is doing his best to look serious*
Raymond: "A good cautionary story on how we may soon have a way to handle explosives...Explosive tempers will take some more research and legislation it seems."
Ariana: "Halfway through this week the newly retrofitted docks are expecting their first arrival of a major cruise ship. our Favorite Intern Kyler Victors has some details. Kyler?"
*The camera cuts to the fidgety intern doing his best to hold still and speak slowly standing down at the longer Reception area with the Closed off pier behind him. The entire place is strung up with blue and green and yellow crepe paper strands in the colors of the cruise line.*
Kyler: "Yes Miss Bening, Err Ariana, This Wednesday between Seven AM and 3 PM the first Cruise liner will drop anchor here at port. We know the name of the ship is the Amadoa of the Dawn Skimmer Cruise line LTD company. It's a small ship with only Eight hundred passengers and Four hundred Crew, but a good test of the new docking and passenger facilities that have been in the works here and a nice boost to the local attractions. Many of the local restaurants and tourist spots have ordered in extra supplies in anticipation of a rush. The ship will remain docked for Three days and depart on Saturday to continue it's trip Northward to visit several locations in Canada. This has been Kyler Victors for Local 68 News."
Ariana: “Exciting news, thank you Kyler. “ *She shifts position to address the second camera as it shifts to that view* “Spring cleaning is in full swing, and there’s good news for those of you with lots of big bulky items that need disposed of. The Council of Selectmen has adopted a plan to help get rid of those big things just gathering dust or otherwise needing gotten rid of. The number below or at our website you can call this week and next and have them picked up! For all those wondering, I did already check and deadbeat boyfriends and husbands are not covered by this service, no matter their tonnage.” *She flashes a sly grin at the camera.*
Raymond: *Chuckles softly at her joke* “The Highway Division will be picking up large items curbside by appointment all this week with the exception of Tuesday and Thursday between the hours of seven AM and Six PM, and next week with the exception of Wednesday and Friday. The items do have to be out at the curb for pickup, they will not be coming into a house or garage to help you move it. There is a list of day labor companies who have volunteered special rates for two to four man teams who will help you get the waste items out of your home and to the curb for pickup. That phone number you can see on the screen below.”
*The camera picks back up with the main desk view as Raymond turns to direct his attention towards the audience.*
Raymond: “After the break, taking the long way? You may not have much of a choice as road crews are expected to close the main highway around the island down to one way. What you can expect in the way of detours when they do. Also, can’t find a parking space? How one woman is being cited for abandoning her vehicle in the middle of an intersection. And speaking of abandoned vehicles - looks like the local Asphyxiation Point Fire Department is still having issues getting one of their firetrucks out from a sink hole that appeared uptown. More on that story and the underground discovery that followed after these messages.”
~*Cut to Commercials*~
Asphyxiation Point Times
Get the latest scoop on day to day happenings at the scenic town of Asphyxiation Point.