By Amata Dawson, Times columnist
Duh, hardly. Mr. Sav's Anti Prom at Climax was a well-attended night of dancing and drinks, and one of the few in recent memory to end without the arrival of APPD's finest, (which this columnist should put in quotation marks, but won't because this is not an editorial).
New club owner and the evening's DJ, Mr. Sav, who it turns out, though not as pretty as former venue owner Maeve, is a very nice gentleman who isn't involved in any illegal activities. Anyway, Mr. Sav said anyone not at Climax for Anti Prom was a fool. On April Fool's Day, I just got that. He's punny, too.
"Climax is just a place for good friends, good music and good entertainment. The entertainment just happens to include a little more flesh than most other places. But it is all strictly voluntary, at-will employment and all that. Nothing worth getting the police interested in," he said.
By entertainment Mr. Sav means dancers, like the lovely Tisha. Be sure to bring extra big bills when you visit her, she's very nice and the way her rack sways when she swings around on the pole is like donuts to Homer Simpson. That's drool inducingly mesmerizing, for those of you unfamiliar with the animated series.
Guests included stunning redhead Josephine, who owned the dance floor, fully dressed, not as an official entertainer. "I'd say this event is a testament to what can happen when people follow their dreams," Josephine mused. "The sum of people together is greater than their individual parts, know what I mean?"
Other attendees included Mr. Charles, known by locals as a smart-dressing seasonal resident, elder statesman and smoker of fine cigars; then there were some other people, and some people from the gym, plus the equally smart-dressed Christian Vond, who said Anti Prom is "only a taste of what the Point has to offer," and shared information about the upcoming Masquerade at the Aristocrat, set for April 9. Watch the Times for more details.
The only blight on an otherwise flourishing festivity was the arrival of the proprietor of local grocerymat Scrub N Rub. This tall, unpleasant man was sporting a faux-hawk and coat most inappropriate post Vernal equinox for even the most cold-blooded of confirmed bullies of women. Luckily Mr. Charles' new male friend was able to control this hooligan and the party continued without incident.
"Tonight's event was an overwhelming success," Mr. Sav added. "More people came to Climax this evening than have been in the club for as long as most people can remember. We hope that people who came down to visit with us will come back again and realize that Climax is the cornerstone of revitalizing this part of the island."
Editorial note: The thoughts, beliefs and suggestions made herein are solely those of the author and not of the Asphyxiation Point Times Newspaper.