I read your article about the Second-Chance Prom, Whereas most times we commend your fact finding, in this case we are truly disappointed. Beloved Mr. Miller was escorting the very lovely Joji to enjoy the night and a breath of fresh air, when Miss Joji slipped (most likely due to the effect of some very suspicious champagne that had been served at the prom) and knocked down a wasp's nest. As they swarmed and swirled around them, like a bunch of the Red Room woman at the sight of a 20 dollar bill, they invariably got in their clothes. Joji, being the one that knocked the nest down, got the worst of it and no amount of fondling by Mr. Miller could get them out, forcing her to strip. Miller being the gentleman that he was, not wanting her to take the shame alone, stripped and ran after her and in the heat of the moment, they may have briefly run by the prom in self defense.
Sincerely,
Miller R. Time and Joji Bluebird, not streakers only misunderstood victims of fate
Editors Note: The Times would apologize for any misunderstanding regarding the incident, were it not for recorded evidence - provided by our local media partner, Local Channel 68 - of both Mr. Time and Ms. Bluebird appearing soused while naked as jaybirds. Perhaps they did indeed fall into said state of dishabille due to 'hornets', but their actions in public were still more akin to 'streaking' than simply running away in defense.